Thursday, March 23, 2006

Not in your Zagat guide

DC rites of passage. You don't have live here very long to realize some of mainstays of the Capital life: humidity, tourists, interns, the overabundance of law enforcement. My coworker and I were talking about specific rites of passage that start to link you to this city more than you ever wanted to be (or planned on).

An abbreviated list:

*You have cried, got in a fight, or had some sort of emotional meltdown on the Metro.
*You have been stopped for directions by a tourist. Preferably wearing a fanny pack.
*You have seen an elected official doing something inappropriate. Not illegal, mind you, but something you kind of wish you hadn't seen.
*You started or commented on a blog.
*One day you wore a tank top. The next day you wore an overcoat.
*You have a bar where more than one person knows your name.
*You have attended a happy hour at one or more of the following places: The Front Page, Buffalo Billiards, Lucky Bar, or Bullfeathers.
*You have jogged down the Mall.
*You been to Screen on the Green.
*You've commented on the lack of fashion-foward women.
*You've commented on the overabundance of gay men.
*Girls: A man over 35 has hit on you.
*Guys: You've hit on an intern.
*All of your office events involve alcohol.
*You've snagged free invitations to a Hill lunch, a random reception, and a corporate xmas party.
*You've been to a show at the 930 Club.
*You've gotten lost in either SW or NE.
*You know the difference between Scott and Thomas Circle.

What am I missing?


Blogger Whitley said...

*You get annoyed when anyone dares to stand on the left of the escalator.
*You can identify who is being driving in a motorcade simply by counting the number of motorcycle cops. Extra points if you can identify them by sound.
* You know anyone wearing anything brighter than indigo blue on the Hill is an intern.

4:22 PM  
Blogger Teddy said...

-You find people who stand on the left of the metro escalator utterly abhorrable and ignorant.
-You think the average four-bedroom home should set you back $1 million; $750,000 if it's in a "transitional" neighborhood.
-Your average workday is ten or more hours
-Your friends beyond the beltway seem to think your twenties are for marrying and procreating and home-buying-- all of which seem (thankfully) light years away.
-It really annoys you that all of Arlington County claims to be "from D.C."
-You can tell where the president is by the sound/ general traffic pattern of the helicopters.
-Half your vocabulary consists of acronyms.

11:56 AM  

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