Deck the Halls (with money)

Ahh, 'tis the season for ridiculous lavish holiday parties! What is Christmas in Washington without the corporate interests throwing around their ill-gotten gains so poor kids like me can eat and drink for free? This week's star-studded events calendar included the Barr Laboratories party at the Phoenix Park on Tuesday, the California State Society's soiree at the U.S. Botanic Gardens on Wednesday, and tonight's shindig at the Northern Ireland Bureau. These events highlight not only the wealth that exists in this city, but the fact that everyone is a tool. Yes, that includes me. We are all equally capable of sliming our way into any party in this city.

"Yes I work in the Congresswoman's office--he should be here shortly."

"I'm going to fire that assistant of mine because he told me he RSVPed weeks ago!"

"Oh, Jane Simon isn't on the list? Is it under (quick glance at RSVPs) Reuben because that's my married name."

Etc, etc. We've all done it or have thought about doing it because we've all been to these fiestas. And because they're over-the-top and free, I look forward to them every year.

Happy Holidays!