Time out of mind

Politics! Sex! Together in harmony at last

2007-02-16T15:26:00.000-05:00

Tonight I was at the library way too late reading an article about what an ass Bush was to Germany before the Iraq War and I got all Cindy Sheehan angry. Bush even went so far as to call Gerhard Schroder a "liar" because he had alluded to the President that he had observed the U.S. making a case for war but then refused to support it. Two things stuck out at me about this incident: one, Bush is so delusional, crazy, arrogant, reckless and rude that it never quite goes without saying, and two, Schroder is a ladies man. Okay, maybe that isn't something I gleaned from this incident, but it is something I've learned about him. He is currently on his fourth wife (German nickname: Audi, because its symbol is four rings), and when he was at LSE last week speaking there was an attractive young woman sitting on the stage with him when he was introduced and when he took the podium he said, "Don't worry, that's not my fifth wife." Laughter ensued.

So I was talking to EJ tonight (only we provoke these kind of discussions with each other), and I asked aloud, "Why do womanizers make such good leaders?" FDR, JFK, Clinton, Schroder, and Mitterrand in France, all of these men were good leaders as well as well-known womanizers or cheaters. Nixon? Loyal as a puppy dog. Bush I? Yeah, he likes Babs, but he also likes to grab Teri Hatcher's ass. It's kind of the parallel of his so-so administration. Bush II? Loves librarian Laura and then goes out and screws the U.S. and the entire international order.

I'm calling it the Womanizer theory of International Relations. Think about it: men who like and court the attention of women (especially while married) not only have to balance disparate and/or conflicting interests, but they have to glad-hand and be flexible in their plans. Loyal, committed married men (code: stubborn) are rarely in conflict with their significant others and therefore don't have to work around any schedule but their own.

So what about Tony Blair? Where does he fall? Well, he loves Cherie but is a flirt, so he's still got a lot of public love. Maybe Cherie put the clamp on that flirty behavior and poof! He feels the need to cow-tow to Bush on Iraq.

It's only a theory...

PS--Women are naturally better and juggling and accommodating disparate interests, maybe this will finally prove that they are better leaders after all.

Celebrity abstinence

2007-02-07T11:09:00.000-05:00

First things first: let's give a BIG shout out to EJ and her evisceration of Newsweek for its pathetic "slow news week" story. "Girls Gone Bad," features such notable role models as Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, and Paris Hilton. The media (paparazzi on up) give these nitwits WAY too much credit, and now too much blame, for the state of American society, body image, and how American girls act. Most women I know are interested in them the way you would be interested in a soap opera: you follow the story, but you laugh when the main character gets impregnated by her friend's boyfriend who also happens to be the long-lost brother she didn't know she had.

I was actually going to write about the U.S. and nationalism, a topic which I am doing a paper on at the moment, but I decided that my writing on the topic should probably be limited to said paper, and that what EJ was writing about was MUCH more interesting.

In protest of the fact that so-called venerable publications like Newsweek have sunk to such depths, I have decided to not actively read any celebrity gossip for one week. This will have two functions. First, I will not know exactly who went to lunch with whom and wonder if they may or may not be dating and therefore valuable brain space will not be wasted. And second, I have been threatening to do this for awhile and now is as good a time as any. So no popsugar, perezhilton, pinkisthenewblog, e! online and I'm even abstaining from gofugyourself for the next week because sometimes as much as it isn't gossip and just catty side comments, the grammys are next week and that makes this whole task that much harder.

I'm going to put parental locks on those sites so I'm not even tempted. This should be interesting.

What about your friends

2007-01-21T16:32:00.000-05:00

I always thought that petty drama was kind of like braces: you deal with it when you're younger, but it gets straighten out and you laugh about the pictures later. This may have been a little naive because drama doesn't go away with age, so why would that be true for the the petty version?

Allow me to illustrate: I have become annoyed with someone I go to school with. We were friends last term, but now I find her almost impossible to be around. I was mentioning this to another friend of mine the other night and she informed me that she and everyone else has not really be able to stand her since October. I knew that my friend was frustrated with her, but I had no idea that a) it ran so deep and b) there were many others that felt the same way. She also informed me that everyone thought I was lovely and was slightly confused as to why I was hanging out with this other person. This came as more than a little shocking and my level of frustration with this person has grown exponentially since then.

I am typically not one to fake nice with anyone, but this is uncharted waters. LSE is small. My residence is small. If I tell her that I don't want to be friends anymore, does that just make my life uncomfortable for the next six months? Or do I suck it up and realize that six months is actually a pretty short amount of time?

The fact that I even have to have this debate is beyond frustrating. First of all, this person has changed the entire layout of socializing within her program. Second of all, it always makes me wonder when I will no longer find someone so annoying as to make it my life's goal to avoid him/her. The answer is, sadly, never. But in the meantime, I find some way to make this work.

Does this strike anyone else as ridiculous?

The Men and the Boys

2007-01-07T12:14:00.000-05:00

When I'm bored at school (natch, procrastinating) I do a little self navel-gazing. I know that's kind of ridiculous, but sometimes I forget the things that I've written about, participated in, etc. and it's interesting to read about it. Isn't part of the fun of blogging to record what is going on in your life?

I was particularly interested in the posts I wrote about relationships and couple-dom in general. Last year I wrote about the engagement of two of my friends and how that was freaking me out. Well, one of them got married, the other one broke off the engagement and is now happier than she's ever been. AND everyday I hear about another person I know from high school, college, or that summer program I did getting married, and you know what? I am no longer that freaked out. Or maybe I am no longer shocked and appalled the way I once was. It was kind of how I felt when people I knew started having sex. At first it seemed crazy and intense and then slowly, as more people did it, it became easier to understand and process.

The other reason I think that I am more understanding and tolerant of marriage is that I am in a happy and well-adjusted relationship, something that was definitely not the case a year ago. This has changed my prospective on relationships--whether serious or not--because I now have a clearer version of who I was and what I wanted from my romantic relationships.

The unfortunate thing for me, and I think many others in my age group, is that I never really wanted all that much from my past relationships. I dated boys and I treated them that way, and in return I never got the emotional or physical intimacy I really desired. I consider myself a somewhat abrasive personality at times and basically there are two ways to take me: 1) laugh and call me on my bullshit or 2) allow me to steamroll over you and dictate the terms of our interactions. In the vast majority of my romantic encounters choice #2 has been the modus operandi, and quite simply that is no longer the case.

When you find someone that finds you intelligent, funny, caring, hot and laughs when you say something that you believe wholeheartedly, but is a little blunt and maybe a bit outrageous, well then, you've really got something.

In other words, I've found a man. And it makes all the difference in the world.

Konichiwa and the like

2006-07-18T19:49:00.000-04:00

You'll be happy to know that my sarcasm has been recovered after an exhaustive search. I think I also might have found some of my wittiness out there with it. It has been a rough couple of weeks.

Onward and upward. On Thursday I will be going to Tokyo, Japan for a week for a Summit that my office (with the full blessing of the State Department) is hosting to discuss issues of public diplomacy. I have known that I'm going to this thing for about two months now, but only when I was at CVS today buying earplugs and Tylenol PM did the full weight of a 13 hour flight from Detroit (DTW what?!?!)-Narita really hit me. I. Am. Going. To. Japan. What the hell do I even know about Japan?

And the answer is not much: Saki, Harajuku girls, sushi, Hello Kitty, Hiroshima, Mr. Baseball, shrines, cherry blossoms, and Tokyo, the second most expensive city in the world (with Moscow at #1) pretty much rounds out my knowledge of this country. I have never even thought about traveling to Asia-- it was never one of those places that I aspired to go. But now that I have the opportunity to go, I'm starting to feel a little uneducated.

It's not like I have a lot of time to be out and about exploring, but isn't it my duty to immerse myself in another culture because I've been given the opportunity? Don't I owe it to the travel gods to go to a fish market and eat something that I didn't know was food? Or to bow when I meet someone? My coworker and I have have been practicing calling each other by "san."

"Libberash-san, will you email me your itinerary?"
"Sure, HDogg-san."

Sayonara fools. I'll catch you in August (!)

Oh The Shame!

2006-07-10T13:20:00.000-04:00

Oh, god. This is unprecendented. I've lost my sarcasm. That's right, the quippy, jokey, biting wordplay that makes my world go round. I can't pinpoint exactly when it started but now I officially don't get it. You know it: that thing where people don't have to explain to you that they're kidding because you just inherently know. I NO LONGER GET IT!! THIS IS A PROBLEM!

Sarcasm is the currency of youth, so how am I going to function it without it? Who will I talk to? What shows can I watch? and most importantly, how in the H-E-L-L do I get it back? Basically, I should sit at home, alone, with my phone off watching Golden Girls reruns. What else is there to do?

This reminds me of that Sex and The City episode where Samantha loses her orgasm and doesn't get it back until she cries at Miranda's mother's funeral. I really hope that doesn't mean that someone has to die in order for me to find my sarcasm... See? I take everything literally!! Oh, this is bad. This is really bad.

Wanted: my sarcasm back. It's like my mojo, only more important.

Stop the clock

2006-06-27T17:13:00.000-04:00

As I look around my neighbors' apartment and realize that they are moving out, I start mentally cataloging my own possessions--computer, desk, books, clothes, oh god, clothes alone could fill up my entire car--it once again hits me: the very short amount of time I have left in DC. At this moment, I have mixed feelings about leaving. These last few months have been challenging, nay difficult, but also really rewarding. Part of me realizes that the spectre of my leaving has upped the ante socially as well as professional which is what allows for a higher yield of rewarding experiences, but the other part of me takes a moment of pause.

Ok, moment over. I'm going to London. I own this whole experience and I have done (or I'm in the process of trying to do) everything that I need to make it a success: I secured funding, housing and votes of confidence. It's just that the summers in DC tend to go by so fast. This was true when I was an intern, and it's true now. Every weekend is booked and weekdays seem to be catching up. Why we make so many plans during the months when this city's climate is at it's most vile I will never know, but that's what happens. There are too many fun activities, trips and plans to make, but the farther you plan ahead, the faster time catches up with you. I'm really looking forward those those 25 glorious days of unemployment, but if I know one thing about unemployment it's that those days slip away from you even faster than the working days.

Not that I'm complaining.

Bright Light City

2006-06-20T20:06:00.000-04:00

"If you see it once/you'll never be the same again" --Elvis Presley, Viva Las Vegas

First, some housecleaning: the last four weeks sucked. They were busy and annoying and kept me from having a life and going to the gym and doing laundry and all the other little things that make life pleasant and satisfying. Some good things happened, but mostly it was a sprinkling of good and a smattering of bad. But now that my BIG event is over and notice has been given, expect to hear from my ass a whole lot more.

Now I say we move on and talk about what's really important: Vegas.

I have been trying to make and follow a list of the "30 things I need to do before I turn 30," but one of the only promises I've been motivated to follow through on was going to Vegas. When Amela called me last January and said, "I'm getting married!" I knew that that would be the perfect excuse. Fast forward a year and half and 6 bridesmaids and 1 bride-to-be descended on the the City of Sin for a weekend of sleeplessness, debauchery and matching candy necklaces.

Now, unfortunately what happens in Vegas mostly stays in Vegas so I will just give you some tidbits and let your nasty, nasty imagination fill in the rest:

*Eiffel tower
*Darryl Strawberry's son
*Grey Goose vodka
*The Thunder Down Under
*Hottie whistle
*The Pink Taco
*Boob money
*White dresses
*VIP Suites
*Yellow, stretch Hummer Limo

I'm back! Ha!

Grey Day

2006-05-16T17:20:00.000-04:00

Sometimes I really hate how much I love TV. I read an article that said that people who are very invested in TV shows often feel like they have very complete lives because they consider the characters on the shows as real-life friends. This is a sad statement if you don't have real friends, but as I do I can take it for what it is: TV shows you love can enter your consciousness.

Sometimes. The past two nights of Grey's Anatomy made me feel alternately gross, happy, sick, uncomfortable, awkward, crazy, sad, and freaked out. It was a harrowing journey, which is not what I'm used to with my shows. The only other show that often ran me through that gamut of emotions was Six Feet Under-- and that was mostly because of all the creepy death stuff. So how did Grey's do it?

Because I think I relate to Grey's on a more personal level than I have to another show, maybe ever. On the Grey Matter blog that the writers' started, one of the writers of Monday night's show had this to say:

"... I was a single woman living in New York City through most of my twenties. And I know from experience that before the happy ending there's a lot of bad choices, bad luck, one night stands and tequila. Not to mention amazing, magical times that make all those bad choices and one night stands worth it. Your twenties are when you figure out who you are, and what matters to you. You're forming friendships that will sustain you. You're making plans. Looking for your soulmate. Wondering if there is such a thing as a soulmate."

Hmmm, what has my life been like since I graduated college? Bad choices? Check. Bad luck? double check. One night stands AND tequila??? Check and check. But there are also those nights when you dance in the rain, watch Pride & Prejudice, or go out drinking with friends and you feel really, geniunely happy. Yeah, those times are awesome.

And the reason that I sat there and watched the show with three of my best girlies who were all making the same panicked gasps and yelling at Izzie to stop being so crazy, was because we all have this common experience. We are all making bad choices and questioning everything and trying to make our way on our own, but together at the same time.

Seattle Grace, you so crazy.

Foolish Muggle

2006-05-09T22:43:00.000-04:00

So I was chatting with EJ about my lack of posts as of late and why that was. Have I lost narcissistic things to comment on? Is my perspective no longer broad enough to encompass all my friends and random readers? Well, not quite. I was trying to think of something I've been doing for the past three weeks or so that would so deter my focus on the (blogging) task at hand. And then I realized: Harry Potter.

*Sigh* With my imminent departure to the UK I decided that I should engage my inner anglophile in all ways, and I thought I would start with Harry Potter. I thought the best plan would be to read the first six books and then wait with bated breath for the seventh like everyone else in the world. When I told my friend Emily of this plan she said, "Dude, I'm not going to see you for a month if you do that." Haha, I thought. They're just books.

Em was right. I read the first two in a week and a half (a slow pace, admittedly, but I do have a full-time job and a part-time bar habit) and then it became an obsession. I walked to my friend's house to pick up books three and four and then walked home from his house (2.5 miles) with them in tow. I stayed home on a Friday night to read. I carried book four around every day, which is quite unwieldy and in hard cover, in my messenger bag including kickball games just for the chance to read. When I was in New York over the weekend I knew I had a problem: I finished a 5k walk and, seeing a bookstore, decided to buy the fifth book. I carried 870 pages around with me in New York all day just to make sure that I wouldn't have to stop reading should I happen to finish the fourth book on the train back to DC (I did finish, but then I took a nap. No matter, better safe than sorry).

Now most of you know why these books provoke this kind of response. The story is just so freakin' readable that I can't put it down. It has everything: good, evil, redemption, adventure, friendship, love, excitement, and magic. I often come late to cultural phenomenons, mostly because I refuse to believe that anything could actually be that good, but in this case I was so completely wrong.

I would write more, but I'm cutting into precious reading time. No really, I am. Hogwarts4ever.

The Gambler

2006-04-21T10:27:00.000-04:00

When I was 9 and my brother was 5, my grandparents decided to teach us a game that was both fun and math-based: blackjack. This might not seem like the most wholesome of activities for grandparents and grandkids to partake in, but these are also the people that had a fully stocked neon bar in their basement and would let me watch The Beatles' Yellow Submarine.

My brother and I instantly loved everything about blackjack: the felt table, the chips, yelling "hit me!" and my grandparents loved to see a 5 year-old kid doubling-down. A couple of months later, they decided to start teaching us poker.

At first, we played 5 card draw with all of our cards face up. This obviously takes away the bluffing aspect but memorizing the order of what-beats-what was definitely more imporant. From there, we graduated to the Texas hold 'em of the time: 7 card stud.

This was my grandfather's game. When he would get that 7th card face down, he would pick up his two down cards and shuffle them a couple of times. He would then look at them all very slowly and say, "Ahh, there's the stranger." I thought he was the coolest card player ever.

He might have let us win a lot, but he was also quick to point out when we were betting foolishly. "Grandaughter [he calls me that], do you see Theodore's pair? Unless you have something spectacular you have to bet him more aggressively. Make him earn it."

After a couple of years of playing just the four of us, we decided we wanted to open up the game. So after family dinners or Jewish holidays we would flip the dining room table boards to the felt side and deal in my parents, my aunt and uncle, or anyone who happened to dine with us that night and play 7 card stud. I usually lost when we played these big games. My dad, who was unable to ever let us win anything as children, was a decent poker player and he would bait my grandfather into playing for real. My mother and grandmother enjoyed the game, but weren't about to go toe-to-toe with either of their husbands, and I was just so eager to be involved in the action that I wouldn't fold a hand.

We continued to play poker after dinner at my grandparents house until they moved to California was I was 16. As we got older, the games got a little more competitive, and a little more based in actual skill. The one glorious night that I bluffed my father out of a pot was the highpoint in my amateur poker career.

Or it was until last night when I won $80 off of seven Princeton boys playing Texas hold 'em.

Thanks Gramps!

Tommy can you hear me??

2006-04-18T23:13:00.000-04:00

I can't believe I'm going to write this because it just confirms that I've been thinking WAY too much about it. But there it is. TomKat has produced a heir and it is wrong!!

Witness Katie Holmes circa January 2005: she's Punk'd by Ashton Kutcher, is making her biggest movie to date (Batman Begins) and has just broken up with her fiancee Chris Klein. She's 26 years-old, Midwestern, hot, and has a shitload of talent. I would have to say that she's in my Jennifer Garner category of celebrity girl crushes: hot, cool, friendly, normal seeming brunettes that I would have known in high school or college.

Kate (*cringe*) Holmes circa April 2006: she's just had a baby with Tom Cruise who is fifteen years her senior, she's a Scientologist, and her fiancee has gone all over the world proclaiming his love for her in between his assertions that Matt Lauer is glib, Brooke Shields needs vitamins, and silent birth is best for the baby.

WTF??

This whole situation is not normal. She's gone from this normal B-level actress who was on a seminal teen soap to this space-cadet-brain-washed-TomKat phenomenon. She is no longer normal, cool, or even that hot. Nothing that happens between the two of them is surprising because everything that happens involving the two of them is crazy. If Tom Cruise truly does LOVE her there are normal, healthy, and even cute ways to make this clear without jumping on furniture or PDA-ing his way across a red carpet.

We get it! You're in love!!! So are millions of other people who don't act like freak shows!! Nicole Kidman has to feel pretty good that she got out when she did, but don't you almost feel a little bad for her? Tom is making it clear that his love for her was of the typical, human variety while his love for Kate (natch) transcends boundaries--and good taste.

There is only one thing that is keeping me from giving up on Katie altogether: my everlasting faith in the failure of celebrity marriages. Even if she never does another movie, I wholeheartedly believe that they will not be together in five years. She will emerge from this Scientology-induced nightmare and go on Barbara Walters and cry and we will welcome her back with open arms because Tom and his freakish perfect smile are scary.

Pacey, do something!

It's baaaaaaaaaack!

2006-04-04T20:14:00.000-04:00

Ok, folks baseball is back in all its glory. But I've been there and done that. Several times. No, this is about someone else's baseball addiction: The Sports Guy. My brother has worshipped at his altar for a few years and I think I might now too. He writes about baseball, The O.C., RR/RW Challenges, his woman (Sports Gal), the trials and tribulations of fatherhood, and did I mention the Red Sox? Yes, he is one of SoxNation which is alternately hilarious (Johnny Damon aka Judas in CF) and a little psycho:

"I can't even speak right now. Why throw Foulke out there? Why? Couldn't we enjoy one satisfying Opening Day win in peace? Now I'm going to spend the rest of the day worrying about this. Five-year grace period, five-year schmace period."

And I thought I was a Cubs fan, sheesh.

Nonetheless, the man has skills. He entertains, he cajols, he bitches, he moans, he's a gambling addict, he worships Michael Jordan, and he acknowledges that his job is awesome (which it is). What is also awesome about reading his columns is that, invariably, I will be talking to some guy who will then quote SG like he made up one of these little witticisms himself.

Caught you red-handed.

A Scholarly Debate

2006-03-31T12:15:00.000-05:00

Ok, I just can't take it anymore. Last night's episode of The O.C. finally pushed me to this:

EJTakesLife and I discuss: MARISSA COOPER vs. KELLY TAYLOR

Libberash: last night's coke put it over the edge
EJTakesLife: omigod
EJTakesLife: i almost rolled off the couch laughing
EJTakesLife: so funny
Libberash: both attracted to bad boys
Libberash: both came off kind of bitchy in the first season
Libberash: but ultimately lovable
Libberash: both have been raped or near raped
EJTakesLife: oh see i don't find marissa cooper lovable at all
Libberash: she had her moments
Libberash: (i'm watching the first season on dvd)
EJTakesLife: ahhh
EJTakesLife: kelly taylor is the bad girl who isn't
EJTakesLife: and marissa cooper is the good girl who isn't
Libberash: did kelly ever shoplift?
Libberash: both had stalkers
Libberash: every guy falls in love with them
EJTakesLife: both have weird relationships with their moms
Libberash: they both had best friends who had long term relationships with kinda dorky guys (David Silver in his near-glorious rappin' heyday)
EJTakesLife: both of their moms married the dads of their friends
Libberash: haha, true
Libberash: marissa hasn't joined a cult yet, but there's still time
EJTakesLife: oh yeah, it's only the 3rd season
Libberash: both have weird/horrible fashion sense
EJTakesLife: both of them are obsessed with fashion but often wear ridiculous things
EJTakesLife: oh wow! great minds..
EJTakesLife: but there are some differences
EJTakesLife: marissa cooper will never have short hair
Libberash: true
EJTakesLife: and kelly taylor, to my knowledge, never f*cked the pool boy
Libberash: hey, the pool boy was probably the most normal guy she ever hooked up with
EJTakesLife: true
Libberash: both had love triangles
Libberash: brandon-kelly-dylan and ryan-marissa-luke
EJTakesLife: yeah, but you always knew that ryan and marissa would end up together
EJTakesLife: with brandon and dylan it was up in the air
Libberash: she and summer have never fought over a boy
Libberash: and the most obvious difference
Libberash: kelly's a blonde, marissa's a brunette
EJTakesLife: yes, but they've both flirted with the other side
EJTakesLife: OOH!
EJTakesLife: speaking of
EJTakesLife: did kelly taylor ever have a lesbian relationship?
Libberash: hmmm
Libberash: i don't think so
Libberash: 90210 wasn't quite there yet
EJTakesLife: there was the fire girl, but that was more single-white-female
Libberash: but she was friends with that gay guy that had AIDS!
EJTakesLife: that's RIGHT
EJTakesLife: how progressive
Libberash: oh totally
Libberash: that was like 1997
Libberash: and she cut her hand!
Libberash: GASP!
EJTakesLife: one woman's AIDS scare is another woman's sweeps-timed lesbian experiment
Libberash: wait
EJTakesLife: what?
Libberash: kaitlin's like that girl... erica!
EJTakesLife: who was erica?
EJTakesLife: was that the fire girl?
Libberash: dylan's long-lost little sister
EJTakesLife: yes! that's right!
Libberash: who ended up being a hooker i think
EJTakesLife: but kaitlin's a skanky evil whore
EJTakesLife: i thought they took erica to brazil for the cult
EJTakesLife: no, they went to brazil b/c they stole dylan's money
EJTakesLife: did she become a hooker after that??
Libberash: yes, she did
Libberash: not brazil, mexico
Libberash: and valerie went with dylan
Libberash: yes
EJTakesLife: and JONESY
EJTakesLife: omigod
EJTakesLife: why do we remember these things?
EJTakesLife: ooh, i've got another one: sadie is totally emily valentine
Libberash: nooooooo, i like sadie!
EJTakesLife: exactly! she's the Other Woman for the brandon figure who is actually a much better fit for him
EJTakesLife: but who, because she'd get in the heroine's way, has her contract canceled
Libberash: but brandon and kelly weren't together yet
EJTakesLife: this is true. but sadie and emily valentine are both funky and live up north and make the hero waaaay happier than the heroine ever did
Libberash: i thought kelly and brandon were cute!
EJTakesLife: they were, but it never felt right... like two kids playing house, but not two people who really wanted each other
EJTakesLife: none of the kelly-dylan heat
Libberash: that's true...
EJTakesLife: did we just spend the last 20 minutes of our lives thinking about this?
Libberash: yes we did
EJTakesLife: works for me
Libberash: me too

Kickbooze

2006-03-30T13:03:00.000-05:00

I finally did it. I joined a kickball team. DC is famed for its casual sports scene (softball, kickball, and even bocce ball) and after I was the groupie for Calkimmy's team last year I decided now was the time to join.

Last night's intro happy hour showed me what I will be up against: peer pressure, free booze, and competitive flip cup This is a deadly combination for most people, myself included. Did I also mentioned that I have joined TWO kickball teams? How can I reject alcohol when it's free? How can I not compete in anything? (Especially when your team is egging you on.) But most importantly, how can I do this twice a week? Adding Monday and Wednesday to "going out" days is a significant jump for someone who barely holding her own on the weekends. I know I drank 4 days a week in college, but I got to sleep until 11am everyday. 7am wake up calls and late night boozing are an instant recipe for oversleeping disasters.

I may have gotten more than I bargained for.

Pretty Little Boxes

2006-03-26T17:54:00.000-05:00

I like things neat and tidy. I like things with a beginning, a middle, and an end. I am so predictable in my search for tidiness that my TiVo has punished me with little presents in the form of horrible romantic comedies (The Prince and Me and Cinderella Story). I watch these movies because as painful as they are, because they provide me with a semblance of order in an obviously chaotic world.

I have started to fixate on my own personal level of tidiness now that I know I will be leaving DC. I already took care of my professional loose ends--an end date has been secured with all the goodwill and connections that I could hope to have--and now I am keen on doing the same personally. But what does this mean? Isn't my leaving a loose end in and of itself? Well, yes and no. My friends here will either continue to be my friends or they won't. That is not what I'm looking to do. I'm more looking to clarify relationships. I want relationships cemented, for better or for worse. I want to say all the things I never said and do all the things I meant to do but didn't.

Personal closure is a highly underrated, but extremely worthwhile endeavor and I needs me some.

Not in your Zagat guide

2006-03-23T10:57:00.000-05:00

DC rites of passage. You don't have live here very long to realize some of mainstays of the Capital life: humidity, tourists, interns, the overabundance of law enforcement. My coworker and I were talking about specific rites of passage that start to link you to this city more than you ever wanted to be (or planned on).

An abbreviated list:

*You have cried, got in a fight, or had some sort of emotional meltdown on the Metro.
*You have been stopped for directions by a tourist. Preferably wearing a fanny pack.
*You have seen an elected official doing something inappropriate. Not illegal, mind you, but something you kind of wish you hadn't seen.
*You started or commented on a blog.
*One day you wore a tank top. The next day you wore an overcoat.
*You have a bar where more than one person knows your name.
*You have attended a happy hour at one or more of the following places: The Front Page, Buffalo Billiards, Lucky Bar, or Bullfeathers.
*You have jogged down the Mall.
*You been to Screen on the Green.
*You've commented on the lack of fashion-foward women.
*You've commented on the overabundance of gay men.
*Girls: A man over 35 has hit on you.
*Guys: You've hit on an intern.
*All of your office events involve alcohol.
*You've snagged free invitations to a Hill lunch, a random reception, and a corporate xmas party.
*You've been to a show at the 930 Club.
*You've gotten lost in either SW or NE.
*You know the difference between Scott and Thomas Circle.

What am I missing?

Zipless F*ck (read the book and you'll understand)

2006-03-22T14:30:00.000-05:00

Ok, raise your hand if you're a woman who reads this blog? Good. Now raise your hand if you're a woman who reads this blog but has not read the book Fear of Flying? If that's you, than I'm telling you that now is the time. I heard its author, Erica Jong, speak last night and the fact that my friend and I were the youngest people there by about 30 years was troublesome. I was first given this book by my mother when I was 15. All of my other friends were at camp or hiking the Rockies or doing something else adventurous and exciting and I was home working at my local hardware store. Out of sheer boredom (who reads what their mother gives them when they're 15?) I started this book and it happened. I have read it five times since that first summer, and every time it gets a little better and becomes a little more relevant.

It's not just a book about sex (though it has that in spades), it's about relationships with men, with women, with yourself. It's about your sanity and how that is clearly affected by the insanity that surrounds you. It's about family, friends, being rude, being selfish, and above all being impetuous. It was written in 1973 but don't let that deter you--other than talk of "after the war" (WWII in this case) you will have no idea that it wasn't written last week.

I have written about reading for pleasure's sake. I have even given suggestions of books that I have liked and why reading post-college is an important and sane-making activity.

This is not that. This is required reading. And you will be tested.

blajbiljaeighlh

2006-03-14T23:47:00.000-05:00

On vacation and now too many thoughts have built up in my head...

**Skiing. It is for the young, adventurous and cold-tolerating. I used to be all of those things, but last week in Utah I realized that I am now only young. Last year's wrist, ligament, nose debacle killed adventurousness and I'm embarrassed to admit it but, DC has made me a wuss. It was 25 degrees in Utah, which is perfectly reasonable skiing weather, and I was freezing. I should turn in my Chicago AND Michigan badges. I use to wear tank tops in the single digits and now I can't wait to get back to DC and its random 80 degree days. Can skin really get thin that fast?

**The Oscars. The show itself was kinda sucky, a little boring, and my usual Oscar watching experience lost a considerable amount of joy because my brother and father mocked me as I watched the E! Arrival Pre-Show. Do I mock them when they start watching Super Bowl coverage at 11am?? Um, nooooooooooooooo. My boy(friend) Jon Stewart was hilarious, if a little nervous, but that's okay because he had the best line of the night: "3-6 Mafia: 1 Academy Award, Martin Scorese: 0."

**Happy Hours. Why does everyone want to drink at 5pm all of the sudden? I am pretty confident that DC is more of a Happy Hour town that most, but lately it's like the Early Bird special around here. People: if you start drinking that early you will end up in Adams Morgan wearing a pink twin-set, smudged make-up, and carrying all your personal belongings in a purse that can fit a human child. Go home. Shower. Play some funky music and then go out and make a night of it. You will be much happier.

**Airline Vouchers. I bumped myself off my flight from Dallas to DC on Saturday and I couldn't be happier. Sure, I missed a night out (good and bad because I probably saved ~$40 in the process), didn't have pajamas, or a contact case. But I did have a free dinner, a hotel room, a Law & Order: SVU marathon, a king-size bed AND A $300 VOUCHER. Vouchers are to airlines as seeing two movies for the price of one is for theatres: it's really the only way those crappy institutions give back. In your face, American.

**Coldplay. Yes I saw them in September but they were back in DC two weeks ago and they were great. It was Chris Martin's birthday which definitely added a level of enjoyment to the show that wasn't there before, and Beds and I did our best to rock out to great if virtually undanceable music. (Try dancing to Yellow, I dare you) No matter, if they don't come out with a live version of Clocks from this tour I'm going to kick some skinny, British ass.

**Computers. I didn't sit in front of a computer for 10 days and it was awesome. Seriously, it was ultra-therapeutic. No typing. No infomania. No ridiculously long list of websites to check or crashing programs. My punishment for ignoring my master: 120 emails in my gmail account. The only good thing was that I had more in gmail than at work. I'm still not chained to that desk, whew.

**Bonuses. Christmas in March you say? That's right. I returned to work yesterday and was rewarded with a sweet bonus. It's more exciting to get a present when you're not expecting it than when it's owed to you in my opinion and that is why Monday was awesome. Well that, and I think that's the biggest check I've ever seen that was written to me and not from Ed McMahon.

**Inside jokes. Have you and friend ever made a list of inside jokes that you have? My friend Lizzie and I spent one summer in Israel together we have one kickass list of inside jokes to show for it. Just carry a little notebook with you and poof: Working under 100 degree heat while digging up 6,000 year-old artifacts becomes hysterical! I stumbled upon this list tonight and five years later every single one still makes me laugh so hard I snort. 150 Israeli soldiers stationed at our Kibbutz and only five age-appropriate girls, getting up at 4am everyday for six weeks (see sleeping), language barriers, hangovers, dirt...everything becomes hysterical when your main activity is digging. How many times does something funny actually make you snort?

Ok, sufficient brain purge...ahhhh.

A Change Would Do You Good

2006-03-02T14:05:00.000-05:00

I don't do change. I mean, everyone does change because change is constant, but I don't do change well. At all. I blame my parents for providing the type of stability that is seemingly impossible to achieve for such a long stretch of time: 20 years in the same house, nine years at the same school, taking the same vacation for 12 years (ok, there I could have used some variation), three living grandparents, neither parent switched careers, no divorce or significant death... I mean this is once-in-a-millenium kind of stability the provided me with a ridiculously happy and well-adjusted childhood and allowed me to come almost unhinged at any sign of change thereafter. So you can imagine between starting college, interning in DC, studying abroad, graduating, falling in love and breaking up, and starting and ending jobs that I don't always deal very well with these situations.

But as of late change has been overtaking me at a pace that I can no longer ignore. Things are changing and I can stand on the side and freak out or I can let it happen while freaking out. I choose the latter. Freaking out is a natural part of my adaptation skills.

At point of change: "This is sooooooooo crazy?!?! How did I get in this situation?? What is it going to be like? This is weird! What will I do?? (Tears optional)

Six months later: "This is awesome. I can't believe I flipped out. I was being silly/immature/ridiculous."

So what's the big change, you ask? Well, getting into grad school seems like a big deal. I feel like I gave birth. One day I was bitching about what I was going to do with my life and the next day I was starting an application, writing and re-writing an essay, and harassing old professors for recommendations. Three and a half weeks later, boom! I log onto my application status page and I'm in. Huh?? How did that happen? Yesterday I got the BIG envelope in the mail which means that this whole thing is real. They like me, they really like me!

So regardless of whether I initiated the change (you should have seen me before college!), it is still allowable for me to freak out, right? Well, this is where there is a differing of opinion. Some say, "Yeah, change is overwhelming so you need to do whatever works to handle it." But others say, "Libberash, stop being a brat! You wanted this and you got it!! This. Is. A. Good. Thing."

I am both of those people.

Cold War

2006-02-24T13:30:00.000-05:00

Most of you know this about me, but I was a competitive figure skater for 10 years back in the day. I wasn't Olympic-caliber or anything, but I could land all the double jumps (minus the axel--that thing's a bitch) and I competed all over the Midwest. I was skating four days a week for at least 2 hours a day and then I decided to quit because I wanted to play other sports in high school and, um, have more of a life.

Anyway, all of that is by way of saying that I feel the need to comment on last night's debacle, otherwise known as the ladies' free skate. I have watched every free skate since Katrina Witt's dying Carmen in 1988 and they have never disappointed. Until last night. No one was perfect, but also, no one was even good. I was completely uninspired and that just made me pissed off because I stayed up until midnight (thanks NBC) to see it through to its conclusion.

The problems weren't just the skaters' faults. The commentators, Sandra Bezic, Scott Hamilton, and Dick "I was the first to land a triple in competition" Button made the night wholly unpleasant with their constant harping. Sandra Bezic's a choreographer so she spent all evening griping about everyone's lack of fluidity, interesting steps, and that "choreography is an emotional commitment that these girls aren't willing to make." Gag.

Scott Hamilton is a former Olympic champion who was able to win gold in 1984 despite a disasterous free skate because he won the compulsory figures portion of the competition. That's right, figures. Scott Hamilton traced a better figure eight pattern than Brian Orser, so even though Orser dominated the free skate, Hamilton won the gold. The compulsories were banned in 1990 after this debacle but Hamilton carries these demons with him, so all night he was stressing how all these competitors were anxious, "suffering from Olympic adrenaline," and "that no amount of practice can prepare you for your Olympic free skate." Scott, I love you, but GET OVER IT!! You won and you're a great skater. Yeah, you blew the free but under the archaic compulsory rules you did win. We know the Olympics are pressure, stop annoying us.

And now, the Grandaddy of them all. Dick Button. I loathe him. He is a mean-spirited, crusty, traditional, nit-picky old man. One girl's laces weren't tied tightly enough. Another girl's arm position wasn't pretty. The amount of the jumps (7 passes) that all the skaters did seemed to strike him as vulgar and not about the "complete package." He views women's skating the way that society used to view women: as pretty packages and nothing more. Skating is a demanding and a physically taxing sport and he was quick to pounce on any athleticism that was displayed if it hindered the program composition. I think that artistic merit is important, sure, but it is only half of the consideration. But the worst part about him is that he plays favorites. Sasha Cohen, yes. Our new Olympic champion, Shizuka Arakawa, no. And this is how it will be for eternity.

Oh yeah, and no Michelle Kwan. Worst. Olympics. Ever.

OCD: Grey's Anatomy

2006-02-22T16:30:00.000-05:00

I am not one to make an explicit blog shout-out on these pages, but I feel like this blog merits special status. It's the blog that writers of Grey's Anatomy started called, "Grey Matter." The writer(s) of the week's previous episode (and sometimes Shonda Rhimes for no apparent reason other than it's her show) blog about the show, the idea behind an episode or story arc, viewer reaction, etc. For those of you (me included) who thought Sunday's episode was fantastic but found yourself a little pissed at Meredith for taking advantage of George, have a read.

Damn, this show is too good for its own good.

Sometimes love just ain't enough

2006-02-17T11:33:00.000-05:00

Dear Smurfette:

First off, let me say I love you. That isn't really what's being questioned here. What is being questioned is whether our love is enough to sustain us through these difficult times. I partly blame myself for not being there when you were born, but I was trying to lay the groundwork in DC for a job after graduation. As soon as you and I left for Ann Arbor in the Fall of '03 I felt like we really bonded. You liked Ann Arbor--you were economical and clean and I was so happy to have you at school that gas money didn't seem like a hassle. Things were good.

But then winter break came. The snowstorms to and from Ann Arbor were some of the most treacherous conditions that I have ever driven through, and sadly, you were scared! It's not your fault, you're not a snow car. But you were brave as we hit that ice patch and 360-ed off the road. You chugged and you plugged so I could get out of that embankment without the aid of a tow truck. I was proud of you.

The drive out to DC after college was not without its perils as well. Sure, we bonded listening to NPR and you seemed to not mind my singing, but the drive was 11 hours and there were bound to be bumps. The rain on the Pennsylvania Turnpike was more than your little wipers (even on high) could handle. So we pulled over and waited for the storm to pass. You know your limitations, which I have always respected about you.

Since you became an official DC resident, things have been rocky. I love having the freedom to hit the road, but the road has been hitting you back with the two flats tires you've gotten and other inconveniences of city life. Without you I don't know how I'd get to the grocery store, Target, Virginia, or Lizzie's house for the Jewish holidays. I wouldn't know the joy of driving Rock Creek Parkway. I would never have seen the amazing houses in Spring Valley. I wouldn't be able to hit I-95 to Philly or New York. But without you I wouldn't know the pain of erroneous speeding tickets on the Dulles Access Road, rush hour parking tickets that are $50-$100, being towed in Virigina (more Virigina's fault than yours) or feeling the pinch of high gas prices.

This morning's parking tickets (on our own street no less!) make me wonder if you make any sense at all. Oh, Smurfette we've definitely had some good times--but do they outweigh the bad? I just need some guidance on the subject.

Love,
Libberash

Things that make me happy today

2006-02-14T10:23:00.000-05:00

**Turk dancing to Poison by Bell Biv Devoe: boy's got moves

**Valentine candy hearts that say "fax me." Oh baby, now that's romantic.

**The Chinese pair who got the silver medal in the Olympics. They're both named Zhang.

**Quaker Oatmeal Squares: best cereal ever

**I finished The Washington Post crossword. Tuesday is the new Monday.

**I made my lunch. Ok, that's a really small victory but the $8 for a sandwich at the deli across the street is really starting to add up.

**Free toliet paper. I used to steal it all the time from my sorority house, but I ran out over the weekend and so I stole some from my building. Toliet paper is one of those annoying items that no one ever budgets for or realizes how much you need. I'm sticking it to the man.

**I'm wearing knee-high boots that I bought when I was 15. Nine years later and they still zip up. Awesome.

**There are entire websites with jokes like this for Valentine's Day: "Did you hear about the romance in the tropical fish tank? It was a case of guppy love." Priceless.

The Bachelor 3000

2006-02-08T00:00:00.000-05:00

Ok, so I was watching The Bachelor last night (embarrassing, but let's move on) and I noticed something interesting. Me and my viewing companions were pretty harsh on the obvious lack of physical chemistry between the Bachelor and one of his final four ladies. It was obvious he respected her, thought she was fun, and enjoyed spending time with her, but they hung out more like pals, and this are the comments we all kept making.

"I mean yeah, of course they'd be friends, but..."
"They have a cute friendship but look! They're not even holding hands."

Etc, etc.

The approximate timeline of The Bachelor is one month. He meets 25 women and whittles them from 25-15-8-6-4-3-2 and the final one all in one month's time. So my question is this: why are we discounting two people that have an obvious rapport, even if it's not sexual? An actual relationship is built on friendship and mutual respect. Sure, the Bachelor is hot and having him make out with other hot women makes good television but it doesn't accomplish the show's intended goal of finding him a mate. It may have taken umpteen seasons (I'm not an avid watcher) but I think they may have finally found two people who are actually forging a relationship on television.

Now let this franchise die in peace.

The corner of going deaf and why don't I have a BB gun?

2006-02-02T00:07:00.000-05:00

Working at 17th, Connecticut, and K Street (that's right three streets a corner makes, whoever told you otherwise was silly) has forever altered my tolerance for daily urban annoyances. I used to laud DC's restriction on building height because it kept the city from the "people as bugs" sensation a la New York or Chicago, but now I know better.

I work on the fifth floor and I can hear everything happening on the street like I'm standing outside. The guy that plays the bagpipes on Thursday? He sucks. Saxophone man? Learn a new song! LaRouchies? You make me want to join the NRA just to take you and your f*cking bullhorn out. And the worse offenders of all? SIRENS. I don't think you understand how much I hate sirens. Yes, they're necessary--police, fire engines, and ambulances need to get throught and K Street is a major street--I understand these facts. But I rarely see any of these vehicles speeding down the street on their way to an emergency. Instead, I see them as part of a motorcade because your friendly, neighborhood Congressional whip, Ambassador, Veep, and even the President have to get from point A to point B faster than the speed of traffic.

My office window overlooks Connecticut and one of my pastimes has become the "how important are you?" game that you can tell from counting how many cars are in the motorcade that is piercing my ear drums. Six cars including police? Low-level diplomat. Ten cars and two motorcycle cops? Either Congressional leadership or maybe an Ambassador. Traffic cops not letting people cross the street, eight police cars, four motorcycles, five black Escalades, and four squad cars trailing just for fun? It's gotta to be Dick or George.

This was mildly exciting at first, but only mildly. Now I spend my days mentally drafting angry letters to the DC Police Department asking them if escorting these people is really so important that this procession needs to happen three times a day. By comparison, the Hill is rural. Last night's helicopters and sidewalk searches notwithstanding, I don't get harrassed verbally, aurally or otherwise when I'm home. There are no speeding cars, no crazy people badly playing instruments, and when I hear a siren on the Hill I know it's for an actual emergency.

New K Street project: one day of peace and quiet. I beg you.

Lab Rat

2006-01-31T10:33:00.000-05:00

With the death of Coretta Scott King I thought it was time to share why Martin Luther King Day is my favorite federal holiday. Yes, there are plenty of other good federal holidays that offer that necessary three-day weekend, but MLK has a special place in my heart.

For nine years (that's K-8) I attended Martin Luther King Junior Laboratory School, or King Lab for short. There were a lot of things that I loved about my school--the small classes, the fact that I knew everyone, the 7-11 next door--but MLK Day had an obvious significance. Every grade had a role in the all-day, all-school assembly that we would have every year. In first grade we recited the Langston Hughes poem, Hold Fast to Dreams and I still remember it. In fourth grade we sang, Abraham, Martin and John, and in seventh grade we partnered with second graders to sign We Shall Overcome.

My participation in the assembly was always peripherial to the two main events: showing Dr. King's "I Have a Dream" speech in its entirety and the teachers' chorus. There was a sense that Dr. King was part of our school when we watched that speech on the projector. It isn't very long but it's completely enthralling and it was the only time during the assembly when everyone was truly quiet. Shutting up an auditorium full of kids is no easy feat, but that speech did it every year.

The opposite of this moment was when the teachers' chorus took the stage to sing Swing Low, Sweet Chariot. With only a handful of teachers in the audience to control us, we would jump up and yell and dance as the teachers did their best to quiet us from the stage. I don't know how actually talented the chorus was as a whole, but every year Mrs. Young (a seventh and eighth grade English teacher) had a solo and she was amazing. Mrs. Young's singing transformed our school into a Southern Baptist Church and we were just singing and clapping along. When I got Mrs. Young for homeroom in seventh grade all of my friends were jealous.

In high school, we never had a single all-school assembly because there wasn't a single auditorium that could fit all 2,700 students, teachers, staff, etc., but we would discuss Dr. King's legacy throughout the day. In college, MLK Day was one of our only official days off during second semester, and so I always took advantage of it outside of the symposiums and lectures that were being held in his honor. But I also think that no discussion or lecture really rang true to me as the proper way to honor this day. There was something about the raucous and participatory nature of our assemblies--the length, the dependability, the anticipation--that made them unique and very personal, and I don't think there is a better way to celebrate the day.

King Lab forever.

Our 42.5 President

2006-01-23T15:32:00.000-05:00

The writing was on the wall. When I heard that West Wing was moving to Sunday nights against the DH-Grey's Anatomy juggernaut, I knew that NBC no longer cared about the fate of this show. But to hear it come down from on high that is actually over and that Aaron Sorkin isn't coming back to tie up loose ends (although Rob Lowe might-woohoo) was still sad.

For a politico, I came to my West Wing obsession relatively late. I had been a Sorkinite since The American President and SportsNight but for reasons that now escape me, I watched something else on TV on Wednesday nights. The episode that finally did it for me was when I saw a rerun of the "Big Block of Cheese Day." Leo explains the significance of giving audience to crazy, fringe lobbyists and the senior staff is forced to meet with people who want highways for wolves, or for kids to have the right to vote. It was a hysterical episode and one that seemed to capture the West Wing's essential conflict: idealism vs. believability.

Usually, the show fell on the idealistic side. Loose strings were tied up at the end of most episodes in a wholly unrealistic but ultimately satisfying ways. Republicans were alternately mocked for being stupid (Bob Ritchie) or were shown to "see the light" if they exhibited intelligence (Ainsley Hayes). The staff was depicted as whip smart and married to their work, but like most political people, unable to have personal lives (let alone master them).

And finally there was President Bartlett. He was arrogant, obnoxious, and so freakin' smart. If Martin Sheen was actually of presidential height I might have truly believed that he was president. He made mistakes (hiding his MS and assassinating Abdul Sharif being the most glaring) but he also didn't fire the Surgeon General for condoning medical marijuana use and he put his ego aside and temporarily resigned when Zoey was kidnapped. It was as nuanced a potrayal of the millions of decisions a president faces everyday as was ever depicted on film.

Democrats love this show. But for Democrats who live in DC, this show occupies a special place. That is why John Spencer's death was felt a little more keenly and why we will watch 'til the bitter end to see if Josh and Donna will ever get together. Who cares if Barlett is a know-it-all liberal from a tiny (albeit Electorally-important) New England state who wouldn't get elected in real life? Or that none of the staff has left since his first inauguration? These are minor details that the show's dedication to bigger ideals has no time for. And that's exactly how we want it.

President Barlett: Who's your Commander in Chief?
Abbie: You are.

Yeah you are.

The Ten Point Plan

2006-01-22T17:04:00.000-05:00

Things to consider before a night of out drinking:

1. How much you've eaten that day
2. How much money you have to spend
3. Should you pre-party at home
4. Beer or liquor
5. Desire to get wasted

Things to consider the next morning:

1. Did I do anything embarrassing
2. Was that person actually cute
3. Is my day lost to a hangover
4. Do I have any money left
5. Desire to go out again tonight

Don't you wish that all of life was that simple?

Sleeping Beauty

2006-01-15T20:57:00.000-05:00

The scene:

8:30am on a Tuesday morning in January 1999. The phone rings.

Libberash: (groggily) hello?
Mr. Eddy: Hello? It's Mr. Eddy. Where are you?
Libberash: SHIT!

Phone clicks.

Scene.

What you've just read is a faithful reenactment of a conversation I had with my high school History teacher on the morning of my 8am final. I had overslept the first half hour because my mother was not there to drag me out of bed that morning. After that wake-up call, I hauled ass down to school and managed to finish the test within the two-hour window (without being penalized, thanks Mr. Eddy!) but it began a long stretch of futility in the oversleeping/alarm clock department.

I have mastered the art of the five minute wake up routine. I can get dressed, stuff food in my mouth and leave the house in a semi-respectable manner in five minutes flat. This has sadly become a necessity in my life because that hour that I spent snoozing has resulted in my alarm clock giving up and shutting off completely. I don't know if I'm proud of the fact that I have brought so many alarm clocks to their knees or embarrassed.

I have tried setting my alarm ten minutes fast. This doesn't work because I just subtract those ten minutes and rationalize my way into snoozing that one last time. I have tried two alarms. That doesn't work because I don't mind turning one off after the other. I have even tried putting my alarm not within arm's reach. That was the most impressive one. I heard the alarm, physically got up and turned it off---not even bothering with the snooze---and headed back to bed like nothing happened. That turned out to be the worst remedy of them all.

Again, I don't know whether to be impressed or embarrassed at my ability to not be roused. What I do know is that since I've started working it has not gotten better. I am one of those people that needs eight hours a night to be a optimally functioning human, and I don't remember the last time I got a full eight hours on a weeknight. I have had to take cabs to work on more occasions than I want to admit. I once sprinted from my house to the DNC in seven (!) minutes which was little consolation considering that it was 9:45am and I'd missed a 9am meeting.

These are only a small portion of the morning debacles that I have experienced and I guess I'm wondering, what can I do? More sleep is definitely the simplest answer with the most unlikely solution. I wish there was a job where I could sleep for a living. I should be rewarded for this kind of dedication to my sleeping! I have never uttered the phrase, "Well I'm up now" because that is never the case. I can fall asleep at any time, on any surface. I can fall asleep on my back, stomach, or side. And there is the famous story of my brother and I sharing a room on a family vacation when he was about 2 years-old. He fell out of bed and started screaming and I slept through the entire thing. That's pretty impressive in my mind. Shouldn't I get a medal for that?

Instead, all I have is two alarm clocks and a very unpleasant morning disposition.

It happened one night...

2006-01-10T23:03:00.000-05:00

Last night the cosmos conspired to make three disparate events occur on the same night and the cumulative effect made me feel...something. I can't quite verbalize what it is, but I feel like it was a turning point.

First, I decided to write a letter. Not just any letter, but a cathartic ex-boyfriend letter. I am not sure if it's meant to be sent, but damn did it feel good to write! I am a lifelong journal-er but for some reason I hadn't been able to write these exact feelings down in journal form. Writing it in a letter made it at least feel like I was communicating directly with him. It helped. A lot. (It also made me think of that Friends episode where Rachel writes Ross a letter detailing the problems with their last relationship before she'll get back together with him, but he falls asleep before he finishes it. "You fell asleep?!?!" "It was 18 pages!!! FRONT AND BACK!!!")

Then said ex-boyfriend IMed me to say happy belated birthday. This wouldn't have been a big deal, but I was a) mid-letter and b) we hadn't talked in TWO MONTHS! What are the odds, I mean really? This prompted a phone call from me which then lead to a nice 20 minute conversation. Maybe it was the letter, maybe it was the catching up, but I felt pretty good.

The third thing is my little secret. Sorry about that, but it's for you own good.

Cosmos 3, Libberash 0 (I'm okay with that)

Chasing your tail

2006-01-07T23:52:00.000-05:00

Everyone loves the chase. Don't lie. What isn't to love? You flirt up a storm, catch a hint of interest, and then try to manuever yourself into a relationship through an elaborate set of dropped hints and games. The chase means you can project the best version of you. The version that looks put together, is intelligent, and exudes that "I am a cool person" vibe.

Fast forward three months. You've had "the talk" and the two of you are dating. Should there be any games then? I'm not talking about something as obvious as playing hard to get, but what about little games. How often should you be talking on the phone? Should you always answer when he calls? Do you have standing plans at least one weekend night? If you consciously think about these things is that necessarily game playing? Does this game playing keep your relationship interesting and exciting?

Now I love the chase. I mean love it. It combines two of my favorite things: competition and flirting. I have often imagined what it would be like if there was a Competitive Flirting circuit.

"John, did you see that hair toss? Classic!"
"Whoa nelly, you can say that again. She has been using that move to great results, but let's see if she can incorporate that into her arsenal as smoothly as the drops her love of college football. That is where she gets the big points."

The chase is heady because everything is new and exciting and you get that fluttery tummy feeling that bad love songs are written about. For this reason, it took me a long time to have any desire to do anything besides the chase. But once I finally jumped that hurdle I recognized the chase for what it is: superficial. It's exciting and fun, but it's nothing compared to actually knowing how someone feels about you. Or feeling cute even when you're wearing sweatpants and your glasses. Comfort, stability, and the confidence to go out into the world knowing that someone is unequivocally on your side is much sexier and a hell of a lot more fun than 100 chases. (Ok, maybe not 100, but certainly 25).

Since when did I become such a romantic?

Of Mallomars and diets

2006-01-04T00:24:00.000-05:00

Greetings and salutions. I wasn't kidding when I said see you in 2006. The mind she doesn't flow well when she's being inundated by family, friends (of the high school and college variety), as well as enough food to feed a small nation. One word: Mallomars. Thank god they are only available in the winter when puffy vests and stretchy jeans don't get a second look.

With the box of Mallomars I consumed on my mind, I embarked on your standard post-holiday diet yesterday. Yes, I diet. I have dieted before and I will diet again, but every time I do it I feel a little like a traitor. I have listened to countless friends, magazines, TV shows talk about dieting and it always makes me feel lame. "Why do all these people need to diet? Life is too short to worry this much about food." Yet, when I decide to do it I assume that I am viewed as a rationale human being. Thinking this is what makes me able to stick to the diet. Well that, and my motivation to wear a bikini in June and not be a fat Maid of Honor in September.

I also know that when I go on this particular diet, I will only stick to it faithfully for three weeks. Yep, that's really all I can do and even that is pushing it in a city that prizes its Happy Hours and Weekend Intoxication Binges above all others. So why do I do it if I know that I won't last? Peace of mind. Control. These are powerful tools that I have mastered the maniuplation of, at least when it comes to my own head. A sense of righting a wrong (in this case, that ill-fated box of Mallomars and all the other holiday goodies) is strong enough for me to pursue something I usually think is silly.

Who's up for pizza in three weeks?

Taking stock of your year

2005-12-21T14:11:00.000-05:00

What would any of us do without the obligatory year-in-review? Here's my own Top 10 People, Places and Things that made my world go 'round:

10. Why FOX sucks
First, they string us along all summer over whether they will be renewing Arrested Development but they cut the episode order when no one's looking. Then, they order Reunion: a show that has a year-long, let me repeat, year-long story arc, only to dump it unceremoniously after 13 episodes. Yes, it was a tad cheesy but I liked it! FOX also dropped Family Guy only to come crawling back to Seth McFarlane two years later with dollar signs in its eyes. Seriously, choose your shows wisely on this network--it likes to play mind games.

9. Urban Tribes
"An intricate community of young people who live and work together in various combinations, form regular rituals, and provide the support of an extended family." If you don't have yourself one of these, get one! Whether it's having Secret Santas, playing Quizzo every week, joining a bowling league or a kickball team, urban tribal-ness is crucial to making it through your quarter-life crisis. You left your family and high school friends years ago, and now you've been forced to leave your college friends too? Without these folks you're toast. Last night, the remains of my tribe (who are still in town) made me a birthday cake, sang to me and cheered when I blew out the candles. Good shit.

8. Reading for pleasure
I have posted about the joy of reading before, but let me reiterate: you did not blow your mind's reading quota in college! For most of us, it has been at least two years since we did any serious reading anyway. Read for enjoyment. Read on the Metro. Read before you go to bed. Seriously, it is a great way to relax and unwind. Since I graduated, my yearly book total has skyrocketed and it's not only because I'm the one in charge of picking content. Reading now exercises those muscles that my job and US Weekly don't touch. Short stories, biographies, novels, you name it, I've read it and I've liked it!

7. Throwing parties
Ok I'm sure my roommate is laughing at this because I struggle through the actual planning of said parties, but the throwing them is always great! There is nothing better than feeling the love that throwing a party allows. People get excited, they write funny messages (thanks Evite) about why they're going to bring a reindeer and a dreidel to your Chrismukkah party or why they're ditching a wedding reception to come party on your roof. They ask what they can bring and send thank you emails. Throwing parties has given me the keen pleasure of making my guests (and myself) ill on Jell-O shots and RUM 'n' cokes. Ah, yes throwing parties has many benefits. Throw one and they will come.

6. TiVo
2005 marks the beginning of my relationship with TiVo and...I think it's serious. As a life-long TV uber-watcher, it only made sense that I banish commercials and welcome the joy of the season pass to my life. I've seen it all: Tom Cruise jumping on couches, Dave and Oprah playing nice, All The Daily Show my heart desires, Desperate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy on Sunday nights with the urban tribe, Eurotrip (Scotty Doesn't Know!), SNL reruns, as well as random little "presents" that Kim and I TiVo for each other. I figure sooner rather than later the ad execs of the world will get together and figure out a way to foil TiVo's ad-free paradise, but until then network programmers can suck it.

5. Siblings
My brother and I became friends when I left for college. Now that he's in college, we have started hanging out in increasingly social situations. It's nice to know that while I've been knee-deep in my own stupid, petty, blog-inducing drama that he has become somewhat cool. We went to a bar together this year for the first time (snuck him in, awesome sister that I am) and I noticed that he is a fun and engaging person to talk to. He was the one that told me about Ladder Theory and he more than held his own in a conversation to back it up. Hmm. Siblings: They're not just for family vacations anymore.

4. Broken Bones/Casts/Physical Therapy
In case my whining didn't reach you in March, I tore a ligament in my wrist, broke a bone in said wrist and broke my nose while skiing in Utah with my family. This sucked for many obvious and not obvious reasons and now that I have the full use of my hand (and an only slightly crooked nose) I think I have an appropriate amount of perspective on my injuries. I learned that two hands are better than one, that black casts look cool if you have people sign them with silver sharpies, and that physical therapy is not only a great way to get out of work twice a week, it's also much better than surgery. I have also learned that you can't let one bad injury get you down: I'm going skiing again in '06.

3. Mini-reunions
Seeing your high school friends used to be easy: you would all be home for the same breaks in college so you'd have a chance to hang out. No more! Now you have different holidays off, some of you are in school, some of you have government flex days, and none of you have winter breaks. So what do you do? Plan mini-reunions. I've had three this year and they have been fantastic. I convinced two friends to spend 4th of July in DC (it's the one holiday DC has any cachet), then I was in Seattle on business and spent a long weekend there (might as well have work foot the bill for that $400 plane ticket), and then spent a weekend in Nueva York because one friend lives there and the other had a conference. It might not be the chill time in your kitchen that you're used to, but hey, it's something.

2. Celebrity Gossip
Ok, I love celebrity gossip as much (if not more) than the next girl, but did it reach a crazy fever pitch this year or what? Brangelina, TomKat, Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn, Nick and Jessica, InTouch, Life & Style, US Weekly, not to mention Pink is the New Blog, Go Fug Yourself, Defamer, and a million more sites and magazines I haven't mentioned. I do read some of these magazines and visit these sites, but I feel like I'm starting to know things about celebrities like I actually know them. I do not know these people, nor should I know so much about them. Even my father, who abhors everything about celebrity culture, knew that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes were dating, pregnant, and got engaged on the top of the Eiffel Tower. As he said, "If I could make my brain unlearn that information, I would." I'm with you Pops. This sh*t is bananas.

1. Blogs
Blogs made a big comeback this year, and not just mine. Just look at the hefty list in my sidebar and you can see that blogs are it. Where else can you share your inane sense of humor, impart faux wisdom and obsess over your sitemeter? Blogs have struck a cord because we're all voyeuristic and attention-starved. Look at me! I'm funny! I'm witty! Read my blog! I'm interesting! Ok, I'm indicting myself on this one, but I don't care: I love my blog and I love reading everyone else's.

See you in 2006 bitches!

(This post is partially the brainchild of my friend Adam who suggested I make an end-of-the-year list. See Adam? Here's your shout out.)

Cultish

2005-12-19T23:05:00.000-05:00

Campaigns, Hill offices, small consulting firms, academia...what do these fields have in common? The cult of personality. That's right, your entire future rests on the whims, moods, and desires of a singular person. If that person gets sick, mad, becomes senile, or in any way becomes incapable of interacting on a basic human level you are SCREWED. I have spent my entire (brief though it is) professional career working under these kinds of subjective conditions and let me tell you, it has not done anything to bolster my faith in humanity. People basically suck, and talented or power-hungry people suck more. They are unreasonable, unreliable, and they often make you decipher their completely unintelligible requests.

Books have been written on these people (The Devil Wears Prada), movies have been made (Working Girl), and I have heard of Hill staffers being forced to walk a Member's dog in the middle of a mark-up so the yippy thing won't piddle on the state seal. This is not a good use of an educated person's time! Much better to work within a nebulous corporate community or a large multi-national conglomerate so you don't confuse your hatred for "The Man" with an actual man.

Because the bottomline is this: people, no matter how talented, visionary, or intelligent they are are, only consider themselves quite happy 53% of the time.

There are not enough sick days in the world to weather that other 47%.

Deck the Halls (with money)

2005-12-15T16:19:00.000-05:00

Ahh, 'tis the season for ridiculous lavish holiday parties! What is Christmas in Washington without the corporate interests throwing around their ill-gotten gains so poor kids like me can eat and drink for free? This week's star-studded events calendar included the Barr Laboratories party at the Phoenix Park on Tuesday, the California State Society's soiree at the U.S. Botanic Gardens on Wednesday, and tonight's shindig at the Northern Ireland Bureau. These events highlight not only the wealth that exists in this city, but the fact that everyone is a tool. Yes, that includes me. We are all equally capable of sliming our way into any party in this city.

"Yes I work in the Congresswoman's office--he should be here shortly."

"I'm going to fire that assistant of mine because he told me he RSVPed weeks ago!"

"Oh, Jane Simon isn't on the list? Is it under (quick glance at RSVPs) Reuben because that's my married name."

Etc, etc. We've all done it or have thought about doing it because we've all been to these fiestas. And because they're over-the-top and free, I look forward to them every year.

Happy Holidays!

Cowboys in Love

2005-12-12T10:51:00.001-05:00

At first, its premise was mocked. Then I heard cries of women saying, "It's about time they showed two attractive men together on screen." And then New York Times reviewer waxed poetic and stated the movie proved that, "One tender moment's reprieve from loneliness can illuminate a life." When was the last time a movie incited so much interest?

I decided after seeing the first preview that I would see Brokeback Mountain, so when I descended on Nueva York this past weekend, Jenny and Lucia decided to surprise me with tickets (as a birthday present) to a Saturday afternoon showing at one of the three theaters it was playing at in Manhattan.

The movie did not disappoint, on several levels. First, as someone who has been forced to watch testosterone-driven Westerns, I appreciated the total subversion of the genre. Heath Ledger plays a Marlboro Man to the hilt, complete with monosllyabic utterances and repressed emotions, the expansive scenery is shot in an open, Manifest Destiny style, and then two cowboys have sex. This is not a John Wayne movie.

Second, how can you not applaud making a gay love story the focal point of a mainstream Hollywood movie? Our 2pm showing was packed and the movie had the highest per-showing average ($100,000+ on each of the five theaters where it opened) of any adult drama EVER. Hollywood follows the money and it is exciting that there is money to be made. Third, the three of us were kicked out of the theater as we stayed in our seats for at least a half an hour after the movie had ended to discuss everything from cowboy culture to what people in the hinterlands are going to think of this movie.

As good as the movie was, I wish that the gay plotline could have been kept under wraps because instead of the shock that I have heard people experienced when reading Annie Proulx's short story, I overanalyzed every glance and every sentence in the first hour in an attempt to see them falling in love instead of just watching it happen naturally.

For your consideration, movies as think pieces.

My extended family

2005-12-08T00:28:00.000-05:00

I don't think that a strong network of adults who are not your parents can be overestimated.

Last night the father of a friend of mine from high school (middle school, elementary school, you get the idea) called me to say he was in town for business and could he take me to dinner? Well of course, because he is basically family. I met him after work and ate a meal with a man whose backyard I have run through sprinklers in, whose house was the site of my first kiss and whose daughter is inextricably linked to almost every memory I have from ages 5-16.

And this is not the first time something like this has happened. I went to dinner with a mother of another good friend of mine from home over the summer and I felt something similar: these are people who I grew up in front who now want to engage me on an adult level. I guess I should be thankful that they don't hold me to my adolescent miscues (sorry about that painting/table/liquor cabinet) but there's something surreal about talking to these people as equals. The interaction is further complicated by the fact that you both know the same people, their children and your parents, but in very different ways. I am firm believer that the "don't ask, don't tell" policy can never be applied too liberally when it comes to the antics of a child to one of their parents and vice versa. So where does that leave the conversation?

I find myself sharing more with these pseudo-parents expressly because they just that: pseudo. They have a mindset of a parent and the same values that my parents do, but without the added baggage of having raised me. I can use them as a dress rehearsal for when I have to get up the nerve to tell my parents that thing, so to speak. There is a certain amount of cartharsis that comes with this opportunity and I am eternally grateful for it.

Plus, who am I to pass up a free dinner?

No, you're so vain

2005-12-04T16:19:00.000-05:00

Warren Beatty? Mick Jagger? James Taylor? The mystery man behind Carly Simon's hit You're So Vain has been hidden for 30+ years. Why do people care so much? This is hardly a secret that has Deep Throat-type significance and yet people can't stop conjecturing about it. Keeping this a secret seems like a welcome change from the instant gratification, who-is-dating/fucking/divorcing who, I can't believe what she's wearing/saying/thinking, celebrity culture that I am definitely guilty of buying into. We should all take a lesson from the little song that could; a little mystery is a good thing.

I hope she never tells.

The Weary Traveler

2005-12-03T13:35:00.000-05:00

So I'm sitting in my hotel room, eating room service for the first time in my life, and watching Sleepers for the umpteenth time because as much as it disturbs me, I also think it's a phenomenal movie. This scene is made even more depressing by the fact that I have forgotten my cell phone and I refuse to pay for calls from the hotel's phone so I'm completely unreachable. I'm in Wilmington, Delaware and that's when it hits me: business travel sucks.
I had heard people complain about business trips, but never really experienced the suckiness until yesterday.

My first business trip was to Denver for the '04 election and besides the cold weather and long hours, it was fantastic. We made fun of people on Halloween for dressing up, I learned that Rocky Mountain High also applies to alcohol, and our candidate won. Not bad.

Then I went to Boston and spent two days catering to my boss' every whim, but spent the night there drinking alcohol out of a bowl and embarrassing myself mightily in front of my family friend's fiancee. Whatever, it made for a good story at the wedding.

Then I went to Seattle for a week in August. If you don't know much about Seattle, know this: August and September are the best times to visit. It is perfect weather. I was also put up at a four-star hotel and had dinner on the top floor of the Space Needle, all expenses paid.

Little Rock was its own adventure and that but that brings me to yesterday. I knew the trip was already off to a bad start when my coworker, who I usually travel with, wasn't going to be able to go. Strike one. I hauled myself out of bed and 7am and of course my train was delayed. Strike two. When I got to the convention center and I quickly realized I've been asked to do mission: impossible. It was obvious that the conference was much smaller and more difficult to navigate than I had expected. I made what contacts I could and fled shortly after the evening's reception started.

So that is why I was sitting in my room at 8 eating room service and watching TV. I figured I'd go to bed at 11 after the movie was over. I was exhausted and at least I could get a good night's sleep.

Nine hours and one lumpy-ass mattress later I checked out. Strike three.

A picture's worth... well, you know

2005-11-28T22:05:00.000-05:00

I went to the Museum of Modern Art in New York over Thanksgiving weekend and I forgot how much more better images can be at communicating what you're feeling and/or thinking.

Got art?

[KEY:
Image 1: Shot of The Gates from last February. The idea of walking through some orange gates in the middle of a gray winter day didn't seem marketable or even exciting until I went. It was one of those gorgeously sunny, but brutally cold, days and it made the juxtaposition of the orange with the dead trees and snow that much more keen. Christo rocks.
Image 2: Jasper Johns, Map, oil on canvas, 1961. This one jumped out at me at the museum for a couple of reasons. First of all, everyone in my office has a U.S. map on their wall (it's the nature of our work) and the idea of having one that is this intense appealed to me. Also, I think its essential themes (upheaval, uncertainty) are as resounding today as they were then in 1961. Probably more so.
Image 3: Rorschach inkblot. If you've ever lay on you back trying to make out what that cloud looks like or tried to see a bunny or a duck, then you're doing really thinking about this little baby. The idea that the human mind can see thousands of images in this one inkblot is staggering. Sometimes you have to sit back and ingest how cool that is.
Image 4: I tend to like art that is calming (Image 2 notwithstanding) so almost every Ansel Adams photograph is high art to me. I wish that I would have had the bright idea to take a camera, tripod, and shitloads of black and white film out West to take pictures of some of the most awe-inspiring sites in nature. Adams genius is capturing these places in all their majesty, nothing more and nothing less.]

Going to the chapel

2005-11-22T18:18:00.000-05:00

Here's the deal: my second friend from college got engaged last week. These aren't just acquaintances that I had a discussion section with but friends that I smoked with, drank with, and cried about boys with, who are now going to have "Mrs." in front of their names. Somehow when it was just one of them, it felt okay. Her and her fiancée had been together for three years, were living together, and had a dog together, so marriage was coming and that was fine. But now that there are two of them engaged, I have to start rethinking the logic of the whole marriage scenario.

Maybe it's because my own life is so far from that course that I find it impossible to even digest what marriage involves. Living with another person, having a joint checking account, splitting holidays between families, and oh yeah, WANTING TO SPEND THE REST OF YOUR LIVES TOGETHER. There are very few people in my life that I like spending more than a few hours with, so the concept of together forever sounds a little far-fetched.

Ok, ok, now you're saying, "But Libberash, if you were with someone you would have a different view." To that I say,"No, fuck off." We've all been in serious relationships by this point in our lives and it just kills me that all of the sudden any serious relationship we have has to be on the marriage track. In fact, I know people who have broken up perfectly good relationships because neither of them were quite "there" in terms of marriage. Baby with the bathwater, much?

Before you take the image of a bitter, man-hating feminazi from all of this let me just say, despite all my reservations about getting married in general, my two friends that are engaged are truly happy. I mean sun-shining-birds-chirping-sometimes-you-just-know happy. So I, being the good supportive friend, am happy for them. Honest to goodness.

But don't you dare aim that bouquet at me.

What I'm not missing

2005-11-17T22:34:00.000-05:00

So this might be premature, but I've been thinking about Thanksgiving. This will be the first time in my life that I will not be home for Turkey Day. With the brother and I both residing on the East Coast, our rents made the generous suggestion that we all break bread with our family in New Jersey rather than coming home. We both gratefully agreed so we could avoid the expensive flight, the screaming children, and the generally messiness that is O'Hare airport around the holidays.

The other thing that I'm avoiding (purposely?) is seeing people I know from high school. Not my friends from high school, mind you, because they're either not coming home or I just recently saw them. No, I'm talking about the official bar night at Prairie Moon where you arm yourself with interesting stories and a cocktail in order to prove that you have made a life for yourself outside of Evanston and that you've matured accordingly.

Descending upon the bar the night before Thanksgiving you see people that you either haven't thought about, forgotten existed, or have been morbidly curious since high school. During college, this was a time honored ritual because we were still mostly tethered to Evanston, for better or for worse. My friends and I were still excited to see these random folks and get caught up on their lives, but since my senior year, this has becoming an increasingly cringeworthy exercise. Are we really going to rehash that thing I did sophomore year? Or that guy that you dated? Really? That's what we're going to talk about?

Occasionally I see that person that I have lost touch with who I actually want to see, and we separate from the group and talk about real things that have been going on in each other's lives. Unfortunately I usually spend the night engaged in pathetic small talk or eyeing the cast of characters with a smug sense of superiority over those that I once deemed as "cool."

The best example of this was when I ran into my high school crush two years ago. We have known each other since fifth grade and I had "dated" for a month in seventh grade. (He dumped me because I was flat--was the joke ever on him!) I lusted after him all through high school: went to any play he was in, convinced myself that when he flirted with my friends he was just trying to make me jealous, and even hooked up with him a couple of times. I literally bumped into him and was pretty stoked to catch up.

"Hey!! How are you??" I hugged him hello.

Twenty minutes later and not a word in edgewise, I interjected.

"Oh, yeah you're going to move back here? That's great!! Well, you know I'm good too. I'm moving to DC, I've been dating someone and school is great, thanks for asking."

At that point I made a mad dash to the bathroom. Were you always this self-centered? How had I thought you were crushworthy for so long?

Want to know the ironic part? My friend told me later that she overheard him talking to someone else and he said that I was, "obviously trying too hard to prove I had moved on."

Well, that's just fine. Because you were always a horrible actor.

Happy Thanksgiving!

When I'm 64... I'll be cooler than my children

2005-11-15T22:47:00.000-05:00

The Quizzo crew and I were pondering this today: how did our parents become cooler than us? How did these people whose mere presence used to send us shuddering and whose every comments were just another thing we were going to have to tell our therapists about, start leading cooler lives than us?

We all thought that our parents lives' rose and fell with our own, but guess what? They never did. They have hit the peak of the mountain. They're empty nesters, and empty nesters are like two silly kids in love but with one big difference. THEY HAVE MEANS.

Stick with me on this: you go through your teenage years, all angsty and acne-filled, but you have a lot of freaking freedom and very few real world responsibilities. Then you have your quarter-life crisis, where you try to find a job/career you like and meet someone you don't hate. You two get married, have kids, raise them, and then one day you realize you haven't bought a new shirt in five years because your kids have sucked you dry. That's okay though, because one kid is driving and the other one just got Bar Mitzvah-ed, and you slowly are able to start to focus on yourself for the first time in 15 years.

Then, one kid goes off to college. Sure, tuition payments are siphoning money off and the kid keeps telling you she needs "books" and "food," but hey, education means the possibility that she could one day be employable. The other kid's at home, but he's in high school and so the exchange of car keys becomes the only daily interaction you and your spouse have with him. That's fine, though, because you haven't had a this many nights to yourself since Carter was in office.

Then, something magical happens. One kid graduates and gets a job! And the other one is in school but the tuition payments aren't that bad because now you're only supporting three people instead of four, and even that is temporary. You realize you're married to a person you still don't hate and you have real world responsibilities, but you also have a fair amount of money because your empty nest years tend to coincide with your super-gainfully employed years.

So you decide you can travel more, you buy hybrid cars on a whim, you go to U2 concerts, all the while your own children, who are now employed but are suffering through their own quarter-life crises, wonder why their parents (now in their 50s or 60s) appear to have a much more satisfying and exciting social life than they do (in their 20s).

55 is the new 25, you heard it here first.

In this edition: Dell sucks, Bubba rocks and hangovers are usually worth it

2005-11-12T18:36:00.000-05:00

Did you miss me? Nah, don't lie. Rebuilding your computer from the ground up is not something that I recommend. There is a reason that I paid Dell to install Windows and Microsoft Office when I bought the damn thing the first time. Nevertheless, here are the three important lessons that I have gleaned from this experience:

1) Patience is a virtue. It's self-explanatory, but important to remember when you spend two hours on the phone with Dell technician Jennie who has explained to you dead hard drives are her "bread and butter." Thanks Jennie, I feel so much better. 2) I am smarter than I thought I was. After a disasterous moment when I thought I had lost all of my papers from college (among other things) I saved my own day by finding a CD marked, "My backup 7/23/05." Big ups to Libby on July 23rd! She was awesome! 3) The sex mixes were saved! Copypod is the best thing to ever happen to me and it will have my eternal gratitude.

Ok, enough housecleaning. On to what you all surely want to know about: Little Rock. Man, that town is fun! I know you're rolling your eyes but if you want to go somewhere random for a weekend, I totally recommend it. Little Rock is desperate for your business. Come visit. Please. They'll won't beg you, but they'll come close.

So Thursday night, my co-worker and I checked into the Holiday Inn Presidential and found ourselves at the mercy of a young, Republican alumnus of ours. He showed us all the hotspots: The Flying Fish, complete with a Catfish Wall of Fame where I was forced to eat fried okra, the Capital Hotel where I smoked a cigar (!) and got plenty of those, "who-do-those-city-folk-think-they-are" looks, and finally The Cajun's Wharf, where we danced all night and harrassed the band into playing, "I Got Friends in Low Places." Thursday was just a warm-up for Friday's big event.

At 6:30pm on Friday, we entered Billy's House. The Clinton Presidential Library is amazing. Seriously, so freaking cool. I know some people say it looks like a trailer at night, but that doesn't take away from it's other great attributes. We had rented out the library for our group which was only 30 people, so we basically had the place to ourselves. It has the crisp and clean look of a new museum, plus everything is laid out really well. There is a full-scale replica of the Oval Office as it was laid out during his presidency, as well as a full-scale Cabinet room. Sit in his chair and not feel chills, I dare you.

My feet were hurt so much from a full day of activities that I took my shoes off and made myself at home as I moved through the museum. I read about the longest period of economic expansion in American history. I watched a puff piece video describing Clinton's rise to power (a obvious emotional ploy, but damn if it didn't work) and I read letters that everyone from Queen Elizabeth to Sheryl Crow had written the Clintons praising their family,their commitment to this country and their hospitality. I felt alternately happy for taking this walk down memory lane, and severely depressed at the fact that it was a memory. Leave it to Dubya to try and ruin even the Clinton Library.

Later, my co-worker and I did our best to ruin our reputations in Little Rock. That was easily accomplished by flirting with guys wearing cowboy hats whose girlfriends did not look pleased and by dancing flirtatiously on the stage at the piano bar to "Baby Got Back." I headed back to the hotel at 3am forced myself to pack for my 7:30am flight and collapsed...until 7:10am.

I managed to get to the airport and through security by 7:25am (the miracle of small airports), but my stupid flight had already pushed away from the gate. I was able to make my connecting flight out of Dallas, but I wore my sunglasses the entire way (yes, I was that girl) and that takes us to last Saturday afternoon when I was informed that my hard drive was dead.

Consider yourself in the know.

We interrupt this program

2005-11-07T13:49:00.000-05:00

for me to tell my faithful readers (both of you), that the hard drive on my home computer has died. It was a sudden, tragic death that has me questioning everything: how did this happen? What could I have done differently? What will happen to my music? WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO MY MUSIC??

The answers to these questions, according to Dell, is there is no good reason it happened, there is nothing I could have done differently, and there is a possiblity that my music can be saved. (oh please, oh please, oh please!) So until I get everything set back up (I'm hoping to use my day off on Friday for this purpose), my posting rate will flag. I am blogging from work right now and it feels wrong. Only vaguely wrong, but wrong nonetheless.

I do have lots to share, so here' s a preview of what to expect when I'm back up and running: my trip to Little Rock, UPIs, and maybe a prelude to the holiday season.

In the meantime, technology can suck it.

AR-Kansas

2005-11-03T00:46:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow I'm going to Little Rock, Arkansas for work. This might be my one and only chance in life to go to Arkansas, which is nice in order to keep my dream of going to all 50 states alive. As far as I can tell, everyone in Little Rock has seen the Clinton Library upwards of 100 times, and you are required by law to eat barbeque. My co-worker and I have been instructed by our Board Chairman (who is from Little Rock) to eat at a place called the Cajun Wharf and drink alcohol out of a mason jar. And we're going clubbing. What does clubbing in Little Rock consist of? Um, right, I'll get back to you on that.

And don't worry about the holidays this year--you're all getting bobbleheads for xmas.

Bubba-land here I come!

Good, clean Midwestern fun

2005-10-31T20:44:00.000-05:00

This is what we learned in school

Based on previous posts, I bet you thought I'd be writing about this article, and while I have many opinions on it, I am almost too depressed to blog about it now. As has been said by many of my hot, single chicas, "Avoid sarcasm if you hope to land a man? We're SCREWED."

Let's focus on the positive though. There are few things better in this life than than a good crisp, fall day in the Midwest--super green grass, red maples, and football. That is a key ingredient in the mix. So this past weekend I stumbled home for the Michigan-Northwestern football game at Ryan Field. I was not the only one to do this a Chicago is basically Ann Arbor Southwest, but the amount of people that showed up prompted me to dub this weekend as non-other than REUNION 2K5. You may remember Reunion 2K4 and all its hijinx and this weekend we only built on the tradition.

My parents being the random, somewhat unpredictable people they are, offered up the idea of using our house for a tailgate before the game. At first I was skeptical (I don't like hosting things) but eventually the amount of people swelled to a point where it became necessary.

So Saturday afternoon Reunion 2K5 descended upon my little ol' house and any semblance of my childhood was erased. Nothing about my house in Evanston says,"Libby's childhood" anymore. My room has been stripped of any childhood posters or keepsakes, and our family albums have been relegated to a cabinet next to the TV. But Saturday was really childhood's end. We played flip cup in my backyard. Flip. Cup. My mom took pictures like we were playing a game at my birthday party, but instead the game was, "get trashed at my house." My house!! (You'll excuse me if it takes me some time to get over this--my house was never on the party circuit in high school)

So four games of flip cup later we're hammered and three bridesmaids-to-be (me, Suz and Jo) and one bride-t0-be (Amy) get to the parking lot of Ryan Field and start making our way through various tailgates in search of more beer. I broke up a football game between four little boys in my quest for free food. I would feel badly, but they got the last laugh as one of them yelled, "try and catch this" and as I leapt for the ball I landed squarely against an SUV. I mean I hit the back windshield and trickled down Wile E. Coyote style. Luckily I was toasted and so the pain was minimal (the bruising however, is not).

We finally stumbled upon some Michigan fans and told them that we were a Bachelorette party and that Amy was getting married in two weeks (10 months and two weeks, but whatever) and they were more than happy to offer her their condolences and some beer.

The game itself was pretty anti-climatic ("And Michigan kicks another field goal") but it was good to see Michigan ruin someone else's homecoming, even if I do have a soft spot for Northwestern.

Thanks for a great Reunion 2K5 and we'll see you '06!

I am Libby, hear me roar!

2005-10-25T13:25:00.000-04:00

Bad Libby

Ok, I thought I could keep quiet. If I just ignored it, it would eventually go away. But it appears the time has come for me to clear my name. That's right, Libby is a good name that is being slandered and libeled from here to kingdom come. "Libby might be indicted," "Libby's notes contradict previous testimony," and the worst one of all, "Libby is a trusted advisor of Vice President Cheney." At first, all this attention was okay. Jon Stewart was saying my name nightly. It was fun to see my name in headlines in the New York Times. But now that sh*t is almost hitting the fan I'm worried--what if I. Lewis Libby is to the Plame case as G. Gordon Liddy was to Watergate? I could be living in this guy's shadow (and shadowy use of my name) for years. Libby will start to have a negative connotation. Any use of Libby as a nickname for Elizabeth will cease. I will forever be associated with someone who is a criminal (possibly, we don't know yet).

Libby has always been such a cool name. My parents named me Elizabeth and Libby in the same moment, so I have as much, if not more, loyalty to Libby as I do to Elizabeth. There's no way that I'm going to start going by Elizabeth now that this Libby is making me look bad. I can no longer stand by while a Bush Doctrine-writing-Cheney-loving-Straussism-preaching man with an initial for a first name brings my name down with him.

Let's start calling him Scooter.

It's not like the Scooters of the world were that cool to begin with.

The power of a men's dress shirt

2005-10-23T15:41:00.000-04:00

Snapshots from a great night out:

*Asking Eric to give me a hickey so as to give my walk of shame costume the right amount of authenticity.
*Applying copious amounts of dark berry lipstick so as to look as trashy as possible.
*Eric telling me that the length of my skirt made me look "classy." We obviously can't have that.
*Stealing someone's phone and talking to his friend in Texas for 40 minutes. I don't know his name, but damn if we didn't have good phone chemistry.
*Anchoring two rounds of flip-cup while simultaneously trying to locate everyone I came to the party with AND get the score of Game 1 on the nearby TV. Doesn't it go without saying that my team won?
*At a random, "Dress like a Metro stop" party having a guy say to me, "You must be Woodley Park/Adams Morgan! All you're missing is a big slice!"
*Sleeping in the bed of an absentee roommate at Matt's house. Well, he was absentee until he came in at 10am and asked who I was. I didn't have my contacts on, so I couldn't tell if he was cute, but if I had any game at that hour I should have hit on him--his bed was really comfortable.
*Losing my keys for half an hour this morning only to find them in the shower in Matt's house. Um, wha?!?!
*Scanning my phone this morning to realize that I had drunk dialed half of creation. DWI (dialing while intoxicated) damage control ensues.
*Having Horne tell me that she wishes she could clone me and make sure that my clone was at every party she ever goes to. I aim to entertain.
*Having a hardcore postmortem with Beds and Eric. Postmortems are key in the retelling and remember of a night like last night.
*Having Suzanne text me, "Mission accomplished?" this morning. Ha.

Tonight I plan to eat greasy food and watch TV until I pass out. Ahh, Sunday.

A Public Service

2005-10-22T17:45:00.000-04:00

With Halloween fast approaching, that means there's only 64 shopping days before Christmas and Chanukah. Don't worry though-- you're getting the perfect present. Eric and I are busily working for your holiday edification. The sex mixes 2005 promise to be both entertaining and libido-heightening. To keep this semi-PG we have two mixes in the works: one for good old-fashioned lovin' for lovin's sake, and one for those sappy people who just want to "make love." We're putting ourselves on the line for you, our friends, because let's face it: ya'll need to get laid. (as do we, but let's focus on you guys for now)

Forget egg nog and mistletoe, this year we've got you covered.

Ok, so I'm not a psychic

2005-10-20T12:59:00.000-04:00

Ok, when I made baseball predictions before they weren't so much predictions based on averages, ERAs, and momentum, as they were based on my own desires. But shockingly enough, I don't always get what I want and so what I'm left with is the White Sox (boo) vs. the Astros (BOO).

The choice is easy because while I'm not a White Sox fan, I am a fan of the city of Chicago and more importantly the enemy of the enemy is my friend and the 'Stros are definitely the enemy. It was so sweet to see Pujols drill them so they couldn't win the pennant at home, but the Cards were so lame and Oswalt was so good that the end was inevitable.

And thus ends my baseball postings for the year. This has been a long season full of high hopes (Cubs), disappointments (Cubs), and dejection (Cubs). But hope springs eternal. Eamus catuli!

*sigh* Go Sox!?!?!

He said, she said

2005-10-18T21:21:00.000-04:00

Wow, I guess I have veered this blog towards the personal. I don't really have an addendum to my Ladder Theory post except to share a guy's opinion:

"If we try and hook up with a friend it's generally because we are attracted to them and are interested in possibly dating them. That's not such a bad thing. Getting along well with a girl is attractive. And the reason being is that while all men are interested in marrying an incredibly attractive, incredibly dumb woman (only joking), we really just want to be married to our best friend. Because that's who your wife will be-- your best friend. So conceptually, I think that's why men are generally attracted to their good women friends."

Well put.

I think I'm going to steer clear of this topic for awhile--both in my mind and on the blog.

Ladder Theory or how I learned to start worrying that all my friendships with guys are doomed

2005-10-17T21:07:00.000-04:00

When two such varied individuals as my brother and Alex both refer to a certain website, I know that it is probably worth a look. So at 3:30am on Saturday night I took a gander at Ladder Theory. Ladder Theory is kind of a companion piece to the Nice Guy Rant that seemed to sweep its way across campuses a couple of years ago. Ladder Theory breaks down this way: women have two ladders--one for guys they'd date and one for guys they only want to be friends with. Men only have one ladder for women in general, and they are placed on the rungs in order of "who would I rather sleep with" priority.

Right away this sounds like a conversation right out of When Harry Met Sally, and the movie is quoted on the website: Men and women can't be friends because sex always gets in the way.

And it does.

Every woman I know, myself included, has male friends who are placed squarely on the friends ladder with little or no hope of making the jump to the date-able ladder. Based on Ladder Theory then, these guys would much rather sleep with their girl friends than be buddies with them. So the question becomes, if a guy is on the friends ladder, does a girl have an obligation to tell him that? Would having an explicit conversation about his placement on a specific ladder ruin whatever friendship you already have?

This theory pretty much dashes any illusions that girls have that they may have formed important friendships with guys. As one guy I know put it, "Guys already have friends--they're called other guys." However, most of the girls I know value their friendships with guys as highly as they value their frienships with girls. We look to these friend ladder guys to give us insight into male behavior, to explain the infield fly rule to us, or to put into perspective a petty girl fight.

But the fact is, there always seems to be something unspoken between girls and guys that are friends. And it's almost always sexual. Either you have a past, regardless of what your current status is, or one or both of you is contemplating a ladder change in the present. I've rearranged ladders in both directions and it only makes things more complicated, not less.

Genuine girl-guy friendships may not be impossible, but they may be improbably for the long haul.

Bloggers' dilemma

2005-10-12T22:43:00.000-04:00

I think I've been re-blogging long enough to go a little meta on you in regards to blogging.

It's starting to feel like an addiction. Like I'll be letting down the 5 people who read this regularly by not posting. I feel like I've been posting at an heightened clip since I started again, but it doesn't feel like enough. What is enough? And how much should I really expose? Considering this is hardly an anonymous blog, what is the line between harmless anecdotes and journal-like intensity? I'm wavering at that line right now and I'm afraid that if I go with the former I will get tired of posting relatively soon, but if I go with the latter I'm afraid that you will know much more than I ever really intended.

Posting my innermost thoughts and feelings would make this blog a hell of a lot more interesting/melodramatic, what have you, but I don't know if I have the desire to have the entire blogosphere be able to search my life with the click of a button. Plus, no one is an island so anything that I blog about which is personal would concern someone else who, presumably, doesn't really have any interest in having me publish my thoughts about them.

But wait, they're at my mercy. They have no control. I could skewer you and you would have absolutely no recourse. Ahh, blog as weapon-- that has some interesting potential.

I guess stay tuned to see which way I end up leaning. But it's probably a good idea not to piss me off in the meantime.

Anger Management

2005-10-08T19:29:00.000-04:00

I have anger. It bubbles just underneath the surface, which makes it readily accessible at almost anytime. Let's take today for instance: Michigan lost to Minnesota homecoming weekend. This in and of itself is sad, yes, but not cause for anger. But it wasn't just the loss, it was also the fact that Michigan lost to Minnesota homecoming weekend and I was supposed to be in Ann Arbor for the game but stupidly waited too long to buy my ticket and it became too expensive.

Now let's up the ante a little, shall we? Michigan lost to Minnesota homecoming weekend and it has been Noah's Arking for two straight days in DC. This is cause for frustration, yes, but not anger. Try again: Michigan loses to Minnesota homecoming weekend and it has been Noah's Arking for two straight days in DC, and because of the rain there is water damage in my living room closet which contains various coats, luggage, a box of computer peripheries, my Nintendo power pad, and my sleeping bag.

Ok, now it's anger time. I just get so pissed off and in order to reclaim some sense of order and control I start stomping around like a four year-old. I just want it fixed and cleaned up. In an attempt to clean things up, I called my mother for advice. The problem was that this apple does not fall far from the tree and Mama Rosenbaum was also bubbling with anger over her inability to develop a database at work. When angry Rosenbaum women collide, it is not pretty. We basically sniped at each other like the other was the real source of anger, and I hung up feeling more angry not less. Attempt #1 to quell the anger: failure

Attempt #2 was a little better. I was able to wash some coats and gloves that were soaked, and that at least made me feel useful. The real success of attempt #2, however, came with me smoking. I have not really smoked smoked since college, but damn if it didn't feel good. Standing in the rain smoking was fantastic. It allowed me to focus on nothing but inhaling and exhaling, and as my yoga video says, "Always come back to your breath."
Attempt #2 to quell the anger: moderate success.

Attempt #3 was born out of my (correct) belief that smoking and laundry was almost, but not quite going to fix everything. Attempt #3 was the Grandaddy of them all: organizing. And not just organizing anything, organizing bills. Nothing exudes more order and control for me than organizing bills. You're talking to a girl who's had Quicken installed on her computer since her freshman year of college. Utility bills, bank statements, insurance payments... this is true therapy. It's also quite pathetic, I realize, but isn't better that I organize my Comcast bills from the past year and a half than for me to call you and pick a fight? Yeah, I thought so.
Attempt #3 to quell the anger: mission accomplished.

Don't say I didn't warn you.

Ode to a Friday hangover

2005-10-06T23:30:00.000-04:00

Remember when Thursday was the start of the weekend? Remember when you would drink Tuesday (Rick's), Wednesday (Mitch's) and Thursday night (Rick's late night) and then stay in on the weekend to do homework? Damn. I tried to recreate that weeknight love tonight at Hawk 'n' Dove with Lizzie and let me tell you: it's just not the same. Friday is still as long as any other day of the week and in DC it just doesn't smell like a good, clean fall day that it does in Ann Arbor.

These days I am especially reminiscent considering that Saturday is Michigan's homecoming and the majority of my friends are going back for it. My friend Suzanne just drunkenly text-messaged me to tell me that they are playing our song at Mitch's as we speak. Nothing like listening to "Toxic" while groping the nearest guy and drinking $1 pitchers of Beast. You can't buy memories like that. I miss you Blue!!

I'm trading in Ryan Atwood for Steve Lyons

2005-10-03T00:04:00.000-04:00

Alrighty folks, it is now officially fall. September straddles the divide, but it's October now and playoff baseball is ready to begin. I think of the regular season as kind of one looooooong warmup for the journey that is October. But I should tell you this now: there is no way it could be as exciting as last year. Sorry, but breaking curses and coming back from an 0-3 deficit is a once-in-a-lifetime event, and without my Cubbies in the mix, there aren't really any teams facing historical demons. That being said, this October still has some dramatic possibilities. Let's start with the National League:

The machine that is the Atlanta Braves managed to roll to a 14th consecutive NL East title. Uncle, Hot-lanta. I was never a doubter, but shit you are impressive. I am proud to wear my Braves Little League tee that I bought for $5. Now do yourselves a favor and actually win an LDS series. Divisional titles must be getting old, so I will be rooting for you to beat the evil Astros. The hatred my parents have for the Mets (re: 1969), I feel for the Astros. They always seem to be there, lurking, waiting for the Cubbies to do something Cub-like. And they're from Texas. And the used to play at Enron Field. Prediction: Braves in 4.

Next up: Padres vs. Cardinals. The NL Worst is so pathetic that having Barry Bonds come back in September almost put the Giants in playoff contention. But the Padres held on to win the division and the dubious honor of being the first casuality of the Cardinals march back to the World Series. Seriously Padres, you have no chance. I have a love-hate relationships with the Cards, but it has pretty much been a Wild Card race in the NL Central since June. Prediction: Cards in 3.

Ok, over the American League. The Yankees managed to eeke out the AL East title (Boston and New York have the same record, but the Yanks won head-to-head matchups 10-9) and they head out West to play The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim. The Angels should lose just for having the worst name in the history of baseball, but they also have Vlad Guerrero, Bartolo Colon, and the rally monkey. And don't underestimate that monkey-- remember 2002? However, the Yanks live for October. Grumble, grumble. Prediction: Yankees in 5.

Now the BIG one. White Sox vs. Red Sox. You would think that being from Chicago I would have at least geographical loyalty to the White Sox, and I could easily cheer for them with that reasoning. But I am not a bandwagon jumper. The White Sox have almost as pathetic a post- season history as the Cubs (last World Series Championship: 1917), but they are not my team and never will be. Sure, I'll be happy for them if they win, but I cannot cheer for them actively and remain in good conscience. But what about the Red Sox? I used to cheer for the Red Sox out of solidarity with the Cubs, but the Cubs now stand alone in the "wait 'til next year" category. I would like the Red Sox to prove they aren't a once-every-eighty-six-years fluke, though so when the Cubs win it all it will be that much more momentous, but the White Sox will not go quietly or quickly. Prediction: Red Sox in 5.

October here I come!

APPENDED: Nobody calls me yellow! Alright, boys and girls, here are your LCS and World Series predictions. The Yankees and Red Sox will match wits and uppercuts in the LCS and the Yankees will prevail. They're bitter and ready to rumble. They will never live down that choke from last year, so I can live with that. Yankees in 6.

People seem to think that the Astros have a better pitching rotation than the Braves. No matter, evil will always be smote. The Braves and the Cards will have a non-battle for the NL crown which will be over before you can say "Pujols is my hombre." Cards in 4.

So we're left with the Yankees-Cardinals. Both storied franchises with many post season heroes. The Cardinals are also vengeful re: 2004 and have ever right to be. They were the best team in baseball last year and got blindsided by the Boston Express. They have more fight and talent in them than the Yankees, so as annoying as the Yankees winning the AL is, having the Cards show them who's boss NL Central-style will be worth it. Cards in 6.

Don't say I never gave you anything.

I ♥ Coldplay

2005-10-01T00:33:00.000-04:00

You knew that, but writing it somehow makes it more official. Neither traffic nor annoying teenagers could keep me from loving their show. Ok, well traffic definitely tried harder. I have been to Nissan Pavillon before and it took me 45 minutes. I left an hour just to be safe and got royally screwed. There were accidents, lane closures, construction--basically anything that can cause hard core traffic. 2.5 hours later Emily and I pulled into the parking lot (along with many others who were stuck in the same situation) and I could hear the band from there. Fuck. I think I missed like 25 minutes of the show which could have been at least five songs. Double fuck. Oh well, I could hear them playing Trouble and so I moved towards the light.

I got my seats so long ago (May) that I hadn't actually looked at the tickets for awhile. They were great: first level, row R. They played everything that I could have wanted, Scientist, White Shadows, Clocks (with an awesome light show), Talk, Kingdom Come, plus they played a cover of Johnny Cash's, Ring of Fire. For the encore, Chris Martin ran into the audience and sang In My Place from the middle of the pavillon. Take that Bono.

Office Archeology

2005-09-29T13:51:00.000-04:00

As I sit at my desk I can't help but think that my office runs under the assumption that we're playing one big game of telephone. Our office has such a high turnover rate (if you're here for more than 2 years you are very senior) that the way we are organized is based on water-down versions of previous office incarnations. For example, we plan a day of briefings for our alumni based on an event we last had two years ago. The entire basis of who we invited, what rooms we reserved, what speakers we asked to brief, was based on the contents of a folder the previous office had made for us from 2003.

Today, my job was to create this folder. I'm sure part of the folder's contents will be lost in translation so that eventually, the event we had yesterday will no longer resemble anything that our organization hosts in the future. Instead of preparing a folder for people we don't know who will be holding our jobs, shouldn't the organization try to figure out why turnover is so high and maybe come up with a solution? If people felt like sticking around to make sure the job was well done for more than two years than maybe we could have a well-planned event that didn't feel like such a slipshod production. Just a suggestion.

It's better than making out to Ace of Base

2005-09-25T15:13:00.000-04:00

Last night we were talking about songs we would want to have sex to. We came up with easy ones (ha) like "Let's Get it on" and "Sexual Healing" and the ones that we have already done it to ("Over the Hills and Far Away" has a guitar solo that's much too long) so I thought I'd throw it out to the group: what song have you had/wanted to have sex to?

Sobriety can be cool. Yes it can.

2005-09-25T15:01:00.000-04:00

Since I stopped drinking (I only recently started again, but with much less fervor) I've noticed some very interesting characteristics of drunk people. We've all see the posters that say, "Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 1856" or something to that effect. And it's true that alcohol is a social lubricant, but you don't have to be drinking to use it that way. If I'm the only sober or semi-sober person in a group of wasteds than I'm wasted too, as far as they know. Let's call it drunk by association or the alcohol version of secondhand smoke. You can act just as crazy and/or reckless as the drunk people if you want, or you can just taunt them mercilessly the next day because you'll remember their embarrassing antics and they won't. Hmmmm, I might have just found a way to sell the advantages of sobriety...

The uphill battle continues

2005-09-21T21:36:00.000-04:00

If this blog had a theme, I guess it would be feminism. Disgust over an issue discussed in a history class was the impetus for the blog in the first place. In that vein, there was in article in the NYTimes yesterday that provoked all kinds of discussion among all of my friends. It was also the most emailed article of the day which meant that lots of people were talking about it.

It was about college women who are at elite schools who are planning now to either work part-time or not at all once they have children. They are planning this strategy so as to not fall into society's trap of "having it all" as our mothers fell into. To me, the basis of this article is problematic on many levels. The first and most glaring is that it's pretty easy to plan your future from the confines of your ivy league institution. I never claimed to know it all, (well, ok, I maybe I have but I'm recanting now) but I do know that college life vs. working life is very different. Like slap-in-the-face-that-was-not-at-all-what-I-was-expecting different. And remember, "having it all" includes having to pay all your bills.

Which leads me to my next point. These women assume that their partner will be able to support them, in the lifestyle to which they've become accustomed, with one income alone. This is not surprising considering I read it in the NYTimes, but it still leaves something to be desired. Why would you bust your ass for 18 years, get into a top college, maybe even go to law or business school, only to give it all up when your I-Banker husband knocks you up? What is that teaching your children, especially the girls? I am all for women having the choice of whether to work or raise kids (choice is the point of feminism), but wait until that time is upon you. Do not make any decisions now about someting that could be five, ten or fifteen years away. What if I held you to big decisions you made about your life when you were 14? That is, in effect, what these women are saying.

Seriously, talk to me in five years. Then I'll listen.

Emmy-rific

2005-09-19T00:00:00.000-04:00

Ahh, the Emmys. They're like the Oscars' slightly jealous kid sister. Every year they try to convince themselves they are as glamorous and as important, but alas, they are not. That doesn't mean I don't love them anyway. Highlights of the night:

*The Desperate Housewives doing their best to look as chummy as humanly possible, God love 'em. I believe you girls, I really do, but please don't start singing kumbaya.
*Brad Garrett (who I don't really care about) dedicating his award to Britney and her baby. At least he knows what's important.
*Hugh Jackman. He's so dreamy and he always looks like he's having the best time. Give me whatever he's drinking.
*David Letterman's tribute to Johnny Carson. You could see that he was visibly moved when he was remembering his idol and mentor. I was 11 when Carson went off the air, but he always seemed to be well-respected and loved by everyone. Did anyone else notice there were no shots of Jay Leno during Letterman's whole speech? Hmmm...
*Jon Stewart's tribute to David Letterman. "It struck me, as I listened to you talk about Johnny is that the way you feel about him is the way that comics of my generation feel about you." Aww, ain't my boyfriend the greatest?
*Lauren Graham giving Jennifer Love Hewitt the evil eye when they were presenting together. The Academy was throwing Graham a sad bone for failing to nominate her for Gilmore Girls and they stuck her with little Ms. Everything-is-Perky. Gag.
*S. Epatha Merkerson. She really did not expect to win (Cynthia Nixon, Halle Berry, Debra Winger, hello?) and was visibly shaking when she went up there. And losing her speech in her cleavage? Hysterical, and I have definitely been there. I saw Lackawanna Blues and she was fantastic. She doesn't get enough love (or good material) on Law & Order.
*The tribute to the Big Three anchorman. Not having Peter Jennings there really gave it extra poignancy. It was also nice timing considering how adept television journalists have been lately at, well, actually doing there job. Extra points for showing my favorite shot of Peter Jennings ever: wearing a suit on top and a towel around his waist while reporting in Cairo. I'm going to miss him.
*In Memoriam. Everyone knows that this is my favorite part of any award show. I know it's morbid, but there is something moving and sweet about seeing these people's contributions.
*Felicity Huffman who gave the night's best acceptance speech. She gave shout-outs to David Mamet for casting her in his plays, Aaron Sorkin for casting her on Sports Night (watch that show if you haven't, btw) and Marc Cherry for Desperate Housewives. But she saved the best for last, "Thank you to William H. Macy for taking a chubby, 22 year-old girl with a bad perm and glasses into a cow patch and kissing her and making her your wife." I heart her and she did deserve to win more than the other Housewives.

And with that, a fond goodnight...

I'm back. Again. Twice.

2005-09-17T14:46:00.000-04:00

If I'm writing again it's Bukspot's fault (see recommended reading). Nothing like the threat of having your blog be linked to someone else's to give you the kick in the pants you need to start writing again.

So another fall is upon us and I am terrified. Fall has always felt like a time of new beginnings even though most living things are dying and/or getting ready to hibernate. The problem is that I don't have a new beginning this year. Last year I was knee-deep in the election and had no time to think about what to eat for dinner, let alone what I was doing with my life. This year I have been contemplating and desperately trying to come up with a plan. I know that sometimes "the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry" and "that life is what happens when you're making other plans," but those platitudes aside, I at least need a direction. An inkling. An endgame, basically. But the truth is I don't.

I'm young enough that this shouldn't be the end of the world, and it's not, but I feel a little flighty. This is my second job and I don't even know if I can stick it out for a full year. Do I want to go back to grad school? Do I want to even continuing fundraising? I've been thinking a lot about Office Space recently. Ron Livingston's character says that if he didn't have to work for money he would do nothing with his time. That's kind of how I feel. I have no strong pull in any direction at this point, so I think I'd be down with doing nothing until I figure everything out. I also find myself fantasizing about winning the lottery and I know I'm way too young to be thinking like that.

Welcome back. Life's a bitch.

Too hot to think

2005-07-06T23:29:00.000-04:00

Something about the summer makes me anxious. I think it's the humidity and lack of comfort therein. Jane Austen said that the heat "leaves me in a constant state of inelegance" and I couldn't agree more. DC has a particularly hideous breed of summer and it's left me craving the frion blast from my central A/C with a little more fervor than usual. In short, I have become insular. Are you really fun to hang out with? Do we have an amazing time everytime we hang out? If you answered, "no" to either of these questions than I probably haven't seen you in awhile. I am battening down the hatches for some hardcore alone time.

Not that I know why, all I know is that unless you make a very compelling argument I am not likely to be swayed from my couch/bed/comfy chair/good book to hang out. I go through these periods every so often--where I crave time with myself to chill, read, sit and stare into space. This much alone time makes me feel alternately lonely and happy that I can actually be alone for such extended periods of time.

That doesn't mean I couldn't use a respite every now and again. I'm not a monk.

2005-03-25T20:33:00.000-05:00

Never thought you'd hear from me again did you? Well seeing as the majority of my friends (read: no one) reads the blog at this point I thought I'd test it out again. This is an especially difficult post to write as I only have one good wrist. If you didn't get my pathetic pity memo, here's the news: I broke my left wrist and nose skiing in Utah. On vacation. On the first day of my vacation. Ohhhhhhh, it blows I'll tell you that right now. But Monday it's all over. Except if I tore a ligament as well. Whatever, at this point I'll settle for having the barnacle off of my wrist. Ok, typing hurts a little too much so i'm going to stop. Just wanted to ease you back in. Didn't want you to get too excited.

VA cops can kiss my ass

2004-08-28T19:46:00.000-04:00

Oh my goodness...get ready for the rant of all rants. This morning, I was driving Jon to Dulles Airport for a 10am flight because I'm the nicest person on Earth, and I got pulled over. This was not a complete shock as I was doing 21 over the speed limit. I wasn't too upset about it however because 1) I have never gotten a speeding ticket before and 2) I wasn't really endangering anyone because the road was empty at 8:30am on a Saturday morning. I handed over my new DC license and registration and and saw the cop step back to look at my license plates. Well, the plates didn't match because I had only gotten my new DC plates on Wednesday and hadn't had time to change them yet. In fact, I planned on doing it today because it was the weekend and I would have time. The cop asked me about the discrepancy, so I told him why they were different and then saw him walk back to his car to write me up.

Twenty minutes later (thank god Jon's flight was delayed) he walks back and informs me that he is issuing me TWO tickets: one for speeding and one for improper registration. Well, let me tell you, after going through three months of trials and tribulations with the DC DMV I was fuming at the idea that this piss-ant Virginia cop was going to nail me on such a bogus charge. After I very reluctantly signed the tickets saying I was witness to what he was giving me, he asked me what was wrong. So I told him.
"I literally gotten the plates three days before," I said.
"Ma'am, it only takes a few minutes to change plates (bullshit as I learned later in the day) and you're plates aren't running in the system and that's dangerous."
"I am really sorry, sir, but it has only been three days and I was planning on putting them on today, but I hadn't yet because I just woke up to take my friend to the airport."
"Well, you can take that up with the judge on your court date."

Well. The word ludicrous doesn't even begin to describe it. The cop was a dick. He was trying to fill his end of the month ticket quota and he didn't care how absurd the charge was. So now I have a court date of October 21sts and a dilemma: Do I get my court date changed to after the election so I can actually contest my improper legislation ticket or do I suck it up, pay the fine and let it go?

Advice/counsel is welcome.

We interrupt this blog for a public service announcement

2004-08-11T20:17:00.000-04:00

Well, you knew it wasn't going to be long before I brought my work home with me. Pete Coors won the Colorado Republican primary yesterday which means that he is bringing all his money and name recognition up against my guy, Ken Salazar. Now Ken is an awesome candidate: he's been Attorney General since 1998 which means he's won two statewide elections as a Democrat. That's pretty impressive considering that Colorado Springs is the birthplace of the Christian Coalition. People like him because he's very down to earth and very hardworking. Now all the of the sudden this self-made man has to fight for media attention and donor money against a silver-spooned brat who, I swear, woke up one day and said, "Maybe I should be a Senator." It's the same sense of entitlement that other notable politicians have. It comes with having too much wealth and a serious chip on your shoulder. So don't believe the hype: Coors is big loser who was just lucky enough to be born into Colorado's first family. And we don't want anymore of his kind here in DC--Dubya is more than enough.

The best possible use of tax dollars

2004-08-09T20:16:00.000-04:00

Ok, so a note about police states: I now live in one. Courtesy of our Department of Homeland Security I am now required to have my car searched when entering and leaving Capitol Hill. In my opinion, the Hill is now just the world's most expensive gated community. But to some it smacks of a violation of civil liberties. As my friend pointed out, it would feel a lot less like a violation if they actually searched my car thoroughly, but a quick eye scan of the passengers without checking the trunk is hardly an adequate search for a car bomb. Unless there is something I don't know about car bombs ie, terrorists never put them in a car's trunk. All of this is costing taxpayers something like an extra $1.5 million a day. A mere pittance really. But don't all of you feel better knowing that government is really on top of things?

Feed (back) me!

2004-08-06T17:54:00.000-04:00

Just a little fyi that I'm not feeling like you're understanding: I've decided this blog should be interactive. So post comments, complaints, compliments, etc. I need me the feedback!

Deep happy thoughts

2004-08-06T17:49:00.000-04:00

Favorite things: 70 degree days, no humidity, long lunches, leaving work early!!! Seriously, if there was ever a doubt that humans are tied to the environment, days this sunny and pleasant put that idea to rest. My mood is increased 500% by the sun and by the lack of humidity that is so oppressive it sometimes feels like you can't take a deep breath. High five for whatever wacky weather front brought this upon us. Maybe it's because it's Friday that I'm in such a good mood.

Birth of a blogger

2004-08-04T20:23:00.000-04:00

It's a family affair...http://rosenblogger.blogspot.com

I love the 80s

2004-08-04T00:08:00.000-04:00

Um, could 80s music be more fun??? Kim and I just watched 13 Going on 30 and then we watched ALL the extras including two music videos: Rick Springfield "Jessie's Girl," and Pat Benetar "Love is a Battlefield." It was so cheesy, but so good. I am also obsessed with the song "I Don't Want to Lose Your Love Tonight" by The Outfield, such a one-hit wonder classic. Name your favorite 80s one-hit wonder and you'll win my new weekly blog prize. Want to know what it is? Tough, just name your favorite and you'll see.

iPod: how I love thee

2004-08-03T20:06:00.000-04:00

So I have decided that I want an iPod. I mean, I am super addicted to music, and what better way to soundtrack my life? But it is still rather expensive ($299 for the 20GB), and do I really have time to commit to transferring all of my life, I mean music, onto that thing? I need some input: do I buy now and take the financial hit or do I wait and possibly decide that I have a few too many gadgets in my life?

Washington Wives

2004-07-23T00:25:00.000-04:00

I just finished watching Washington Wives with Kim and I have to say that I'm feeling pretty warped perspective-wise at the moment. Washington Wives is a documentary that traces the different approaches of presidential spouses towards their husband's campaign. The bottomline is that every woman and every marriage is different so the idea that a politician's wife could somehow be streamlined into a Stepford version is ludicrous, but yet we (society at large) were fascinated by Howard Dean's wife Judy. She had a well-established medical practice and a teenage son at home, and decided that was more important than campaigning with Howard. And he didn't ask her to. It's a shocking concept I know, respecting her career and life. Hopefully Sally Quinn (Ben Bradlee's wife) is right: in 20 years the idea of respected her choice will be viewed as ridiculous by the American public as well.

It also brings up another point that I have felt ever since I graduated college. I am by no means experienced in the ways of the world (read: 2.5 months out of college) but I can tell you this: everything they told me about fairness and equality between men and women is untrue. It's just flat out untrue. I feel like a round peg being forced into a square hole that society has carved out. I spent all these years being indoctrinated that I had choices, the same choices as men, only to find out that I have to now be indoctrinated with the truth. I am feeling a little betrayed by my liberal upbringing to tell you the truth. I just miss the equality that I felt in college. Everyone had the same papers to write, books to read, exams to study for, and the choice was how much effort you put into those tasks. There are more women in college right now than men. It might actually be the great equalizer that we have been working towards. Because right now I don't feel like I have a lot of choices, or a lot of equality.

I don't want to work, I want to bang on the drum all day

2004-06-07T13:43:00.000-04:00

Welcome to the world of 30 degree offices, CNN on for 8 hours straight, and a creeping hatred of computers. That's right: you have a job!! My office is so cold I leave a sweater here just to make sure I don't die of hypothermia. And CNN, let me tell you, news is not watching Reagan's herse make its way from his home to the airport...LIVE. The 24 hour news channel was a bad idea. Let's take Ted Turner out back and beat the shit out of him (American President was on last night...pardon the quote). As for computers, they are evil. Even my pretty laptop at home can't save my annoyance at being so dependent on them. Ahhh, well. I've settled in nicely, wouldn't you say?

Onwards and upwards

2004-05-15T00:03:00.000-04:00

With those last two posts I hit 25. That's a lot for someone that has been called a blog slacker. Anyway, I'm off to DC and all the good things that come with having a job. You know: long hours, little pay, 5-day weeks, all the headaches. But I'm excited because it will be mine. All are welcome as soon as I get an apartment (don't ask) and I have decided to stop having weekly panic attacks. On that note, I apologize to those that had to partake in calming me down, you know who you are, and I will gladly return the favor if any of you try to worry yourself unconscious. That is all for now. This week will be hectic, but maybe I'll blog to relief tension...

Reading Rainbow

2004-05-13T11:45:00.000-04:00

A note on reading: many of you grads might find (like I did when I did no work during my time abroad in London) that your mind is in withdrawal of a sort. You may have hated that orgo book, that history coursepack, or that econ homework, but you did it and now your brain is used to that level of intellectual stimulation. Anyway, all I'm really saying is I have LOTS of reading suggestions if anyone wants them. Right now I'm reading Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides (he wrote Virgin Suicides too) and it's an awesome book if you like big epics and clean writing.
Also, I would like to reiterate the fact that Oprah did not invent the concept of a good book and putting Gabriel Garcia Marquez's One Hundred Years of Solitude on her book club list is like putting Tiger Woods at the top of a good golfers list. Solitude was written in the late 1960s and Marquez won a Nobel Prize for Literature in the early 1980s, so lots of other people had figured out the book was good before Oprah. My only caution is that you probably have to commit to reading it in chunks of more than 20 pages because the paragraphs sometimes go on for pages and it's hard to start and stop. I have tons more recommendations (just ask my friend Abby, to whom I gave a summer reading list). So that should help you and the brain out a little...

Blogging as validation

2004-05-13T11:41:00.000-04:00

I'm reinstating the blog. I leave for DC on Saturday (!) and then I start work on Monday. It will be stressful, hectic, possibly frustrating at times, but I am excited. There is no reason not to be: I have a job, my application on my apartment is pending, and I'm 22 years old. Maybe I am reinstating the blog because I need to convince myself of these pros in a more formal setting, but nonetheless there you have it. Me, DC, and a life. Good deal.

Senioritis?

2004-04-09T12:49:00.000-04:00

I'd like to take this opportunity to tell you that I have less than 2 weeks of actual classes left. And that I graduate May 1st. You can send all my graduation presents to my house, where I will be residing starting May 2nd. I wonder what's harder: living at home for an unknown period of time or being jobless. It's a tough call.

Plagarism, smagerism

2004-04-06T22:47:00.000-04:00

Academic integrity question: if you wrote a paper on a topic, say the 1968 Democratic Convention, in 8th grade, and then you hypothetically write a paper on that same topic as a senior in college, is it plagarism? I mean, it has been 8 years, but something about it still feels wrong...

"Beisbol's been berry, berry good to me"

2004-04-06T22:43:00.000-04:00

Cubs win, Cubs win. Winning on Opening Day is the best because it guarantees that we will not start off a dismal 0-14 like the Cubs of old (read: 3 years ago). "There is something in the air during the baseball season that is just not there the other six months of the year," someone said that in the Ken Burns documentary, Baseball, and I really believe it's true. Maybe it's because baseball coincides with spring and summer, which I am in desperate need of after the tundra-like winters of the Midwest, or maybe it's just knowing that Wrigley will be back and open for business in 5 days. Either way, I'm stoked.

Don't blog hate

2004-04-06T14:44:00.000-04:00

I have created a new word: Blogminders. These are the people that harass you if you haven't blogged in 3 days. These are the people that don't have their own blogs, but feel they could probably blog better and more often than you if they did. Basically, it's my brother and Adam who fit into this category but I'm sure there are underground blogminders out there. So until you have your own blog, don't heat on me and my blogging or lack thereof!

Hash Bash (the last)

2004-04-03T16:44:00.000-05:00

In the world of scheduling, you think this could have been done better. This morning I walked in the American Cancer Society's Relay for Life and this afternoon I walked through the Diag and did not participate in Ann Arbor's Hash Bash. Both are life-affirming events, and I guess you could argue a link because cancer patients have been known to smoke, but it was weird nonetheless. The great part of the day was that because it was such nice weather, everyone on campus was out in force: random bands playing in front yards, kegs, people camped out on their porch. There's something about Ann Arbor on a nice spring day that makes it the best place in the whole world. Sniff. I'm getting super sentimental about graduating, if you haven't noticed. Ann Arbor rocks, even when it's cold, and there's lots of traffic, and it gives you parking tickets. I ♥ A²!

SI jinx: feel my wrath

2004-03-30T19:43:00.000-05:00

Have you seen the cover of Sports Illustrated this week? It's a picture of Kerry Wood and the words "Hell freezes over: Cubs win World Series." Now, I'm a reasonable person but this really pisses me off. If you don't know, there is a long tradition of the SI cover jinx. That is, if you're on the cover of Sports Illustrated something bad will happen to you/your team. You will lose before expected, get injured, or just not perform up to expectations. SI put the Cubs on the cover in the Playoffs preview issue and look what happens? Steve Bartman. This is just bad journalism. The Cubs haven't been to the series since 1945, and we haven't won it since 1908!!! There's also the Billy Goat curse, so I'm thinking that SI did not have to jump on the bandwagon and say something as bold as "Cubs win the Series." I'm flattered that they think we have the best team, but I am not sure of that either. To be sure, we could be awesome this year but as a Cubs fan I have been conditioned to hope for the best while expecting the worst.

We're not cocky like that. We're not Yankees fans.

Movie geek tells all

2004-03-29T16:28:00.001-05:00

I must be feeling blog-a-riffic today because this is my third posting. I meant to post this awhile ago, but I forgot. For all of you that want to stalk any actor, find out about any movie or TV, the absolute best site is www.imdb.com. IMDb stands for internet movie database and you can search by actor, movie, quote, plot, bio, etc. So you want to know if the kid from Sleepless in Seattle was ever in anything else (he wasn't)? You just search Sleepless in Seattle or "little kids in movies,"or whatever and this website finds it for you. This is a site for those that are slightly OCD about this stuff, like myself, but it's a cool site for even those casual pop culture-ites among you.

Birthday ups

2004-03-29T12:35:00.000-05:00

Apparently a lot of people get busy in June, because I know quite a few birthdays today. Happy Birthday Janet, my aunt, who probably won't see this. Jeanne, my other aunt who is turning the big 5-0 (and will love that I told everyone) and Jenny who is joining the ranks of 22!! 22 is a totally worthless age after 21 but we can't all be 21 forever (except me: "21: the sequel"). Apparently people that have a March 29th birthday also have names that start with J. Have a good day ladies!

(And Happy half-Birthday Mom! 52.5 rocks :-)

Reunion 2K4

2004-03-29T12:29:00.000-05:00

I'm sorry that I took so long in blogging post-Reunion 2K4, but the reunion hit me a little bit harder than I expected. Let's put it this way: our dinner reservation was at 7:30 and I was in bed by 11:30. Oh yeah, and there were probably 8 sake bombs and 2 beers in between that period. No worries, though, nothing that 12 hours of sleep couldn't cure. After our guests left, Amy and I were beyond tired and spent the day alternately sleeping, watching whatever crap was on TV, eating, and wearing the same outfit. I swear we do it unconsciously, but we both emerged yesterday in navy blue sweatpants, white T-shirts, and grey hoodies. Spooky. I did feel like our apartment needed fumigating (5 people, 1 bathroom not so glorious) but all in all, I think I'll look forward to another reunion...just not at my place.

Prepare yourself for Reunion 2K4

2004-03-26T13:17:00.000-05:00

You may have been wondering about what Reunion 2K4 is, which I put in my IM profile last Sunday. This weekend Amy's boyfriend Dave, his friend Tanuj, and our friend Chuck (all UM alums) are staying in our two bedroom apartment. This is not the first gathering of these individuals at our apartment but it will probably be the last because graduation is in 5 weeks (tear). Amy and I nicknamed it Reunion 2K4 for two reasons: we were making fun of Dave using the term 2K_ when talking about years and these weekends, while mostly fun, often involve many fiascos in planning. Who are we going to see? Where are we going for dinner? When are we meeting so-and-so? etc. We've decided on the ultimate planning fiasco for this final reunion: champion house. Ann Arbor's venerable Japanses steakhouse where we all get so liquored up on sake that none of us can figure out the bill. Usually I resist this endeavor, but seeing as it's our last time, I'm game. Let Reunion 2K4 begin!

Virus attacks

2004-03-23T21:29:00.000-05:00

Adam,"The Computer Guy," has totally restored my faith in the world. I accidentally downloaded a virus on my brand-spanking new computer (don't ask) and the anti-virus software I downloaded to catch it was defective. So basically I had the bagel virus flying around inside my computer, self-replicating, while my virus-scan told me everything was a-ok. Wrong. I couldn't send emails from my internet email accounts, I couldn't view pictures on certain websites and my computer seemed to be angry at me.
Adam comes over here and deletes my old anti-virus software, downloads a new FREE version and poof! 273 viruses found and deleted on my computer! No wonder it was so freakin' angry at me. He also downloaded another browser for me because internet explorer, um, SUCKS. So far he's 2-for-2, then comes the kicker. He was here for 2 hours and he charged, drumroll, FIFTEEN DOLLARS!!!! Awesome.

Adventures of Smurfette the Wonder Civic

2004-03-22T18:32:00.000-05:00

I'm not an automotive expert, but when something falls off your car isn't it supposed to be put back on? Apparently not. There was this piece of rubber that was wrapped below the grill on the front of my car and when I stopped at the gas station on the way home this weekend, half of it had become loose. So rather than let it dangle on the ground at 80mph, I tore it the rest of the way off and decided to go to the dealership when I got back. I go into the Honda dealership today and I tell the guy what happened and he says, "Do you need us to pull it off?" and I said, "No, already did that." And he proceeds to tell me that it's not that important and that if he puts it back on it would probably come loose again if I pulled up to a parking space with a low curb. Basically this rubber piece is the equivalent of an appendix: it's fine as long as it's not causing problems, but when it does, you should remove it. Smurfette is obviously a fine automotive specimen.

Lessons from the School of Rock

2004-03-21T17:07:00.000-05:00

Ok, did you ever wonder why Stevie Nicks was the in the "Bootylicious" video? I did, and then I was watching "School of Rock" last night (really good movie by the way) and Jack Black's character puts on some Stevie Nicks at a bar to try and get Joan Cusack's character to let loose. Anyway, "Bootylicious" is sampled from the Stevie Nicks song "Edge of Seventeen." I don't know about you, but I feel better about that now.

Obama's the man

2004-03-16T22:06:00.000-05:00

I want to send a shout-out to my mom (I know, "shout-out" is so old school) for all her hardwork for Illinois Senate candidate Barack Obama. With 60% of precincts reporting, the Chicago Tribune is declaring Obama the winner of the Democratic primary. He's basically a shoo-in for the seat because the Illinois Republican party is in shambles after it was discovered the governor (when he was secretary of state) took bribes for issuing licenses to shady characters. His term ended in 2002 and he didn't run again, and their best candidate for the Senate has heart problems so he didn't run. Go Dems! Anyway, my mom decided that she loved Obama (and who wouldn't with a name that cool) back in the spring and so she flyered, canvassed, and became a delegate to the Evanston Democratic Party to make sure he would win. She told me she met him when he was right out of (Harvard) law school ten years ago and she was really impressed. My dad says he hasn't seen her this excited about a candidate since McGovern (who? jk). So props mom, for a job well done!

Luck of being Irish

2004-03-16T21:59:00.000-05:00

Well tomorrow is St. Patty's Day. This time last year I was in Dublin, so I'm pretty much expecting every year I'm not there to be a step down. Seriously, if you ever have the chance go to Ireland on St. Patty's Day. Totally worth it. The most friendly, funny, and loudest people I met in Europe, and they can drink you under the table without breaking a sweat. I am blogging now about St. Patty's Day in the hope that I will be so wasted by tomorrow afternoon that it will be impossible. Libby O'Rosenbaum it is!

Defensive blogging

2004-03-15T20:16:00.000-05:00

There have been complaints (ahem, Adam) that I do not blog enough. Well, that would defeat the purpose for me. The blog is about writing when it strikes me, not writing about the random bullshit of my day like, "today I talked to my friend from South Carolina and she said..." etc. Not that that stuff isn't important, but it really doesn't matter to anyone besides me and a few others. That is why there are phones, buddylists and emails.
On a completely different subject, I was wondering if anyone knew a great computer techie who could come and fix this POS I call my new computer. I'm having problems accessing random sites, like TVguide and my yahoo! and hotmail accounts and ironically I think it started when I installed my anti-virus software. I guess this is mostly aimed at Michigan people because after calling Dell tech support and combing the McAfee Security Center help page, I want someone local who can come and fixed this thing. Help!

My writing is bad, but read my blog

2004-03-14T14:58:00.000-05:00

I'm sorry, can someone please explain to me the merit of having to write five papers in the next 6 weeks? Oh yeah, and did I mention that this is the first paper I've had to write all semester? No second semester senior is going to write well this close to graduation. I'm just looking out for the professors' best interests, because if I were them I would not want to read my crap.

Michigan, still

2004-03-12T11:09:00.000-05:00

I'm not sure you understand the shittiness that is Michigan weather. After two weeks of 40+ degrees, I was sure that it was spring--wrong. Last night all of the sudden there were some flurries and then, I kid you not, I was driving through a blizzard. Suddenly, cars were flying off the highway and everyone was driving 20 mph with their hazard lights on. Michigan has the most insane climate of any state I've ever lived in, and that's saying a lot coming from Illinois. Get me outta here!

President Clinton loves crosswords too

2004-03-10T18:03:00.000-05:00

I am obsessed with crossword puzzles so I think I am a good judge of the better ones out there. My number one recommendation is the LAtimes. Easy enough on Mondays and Tuesdays to fool you into thinking you can finish the whole week, while occasionally letting you finish a Thursday or Friday puzzle to make you feel smart. There is a crossword link on the left side of the homepage, all you have to do is register to be an LAtimes member.
My second recommendation is the Washington Post. It has a title to its puzzles, which can make it easier to solve those long clues. It also has some of the same, "cue words" (my own name for words that puzzles tend to use often) as the LAtimes which is helpful. My friend Anna and I finished a Friday puzzle this summer, which was awesome, but I haven't been able to repeat that feat since. You also just have to register to access the puzzles, which you can find by clicking the arts and living link at the top of the page.
Now, the NYtimes crossword puzzle is considered the grandaddy of them all. It takes my extremely intelligent mother 20 minutes to do the Monday, but she can barely even do the Sunday puzzle. Also, the nytimes website makes you pay to do their daily puzzles. That's just snobby.
Some of my friends have said they hate crosswords because they can't do them. If you can't do crosswords it doesn't mean you're dumb, it just means you can't do them (kinda like the standardized testing logic). My advice: pick one puzzle and start doing it everyday, even the hard days. Eventually you'll get the gist of how a specific puzzle words its clues and cue words, and then pretty soon you'll be able to actually finish a puzzle, which is the best feeling ever!

Evil TV, I love it

2004-03-10T17:45:00.001-05:00

Check out the television without pity website. All your the shows you love (and some you don't) broken down in extensive detail, so if you miss an episode you can read ALL about it.
Courtesy of Dresch, who told me about the site.